Lesley Cookman

New Year, new contracts

2011-12-27T10:13:00.002Z

I was gratified to see that several people with whom I exchange Christmas Cards, especially Mary, Marian and Susan (you know who you are) keep up with the family via this blog, so I must try and keep it slightly more up to date.

My big news is that just before Christmas my publishers offered me a new three book deal (that's after Murder By Magic) with all the books going into B format and being re-jacketed! That includes the back list, so we're hoping to see a boost in back list sales, too. So that's good - I can eat and pay the bills for another three years. On the downside, I have to come up with new blurbs for all the back list and (which I'm flattered about) suggestions for the covers. They've all been re-jacketed once already, so I'm a bit stumped on that one.

Phillipa arrived back in the country on December 4th and has been camping out here in between visits to Bristol, Brighton and Saffron Walden. She returns to the Disney Dream on January 7th (I think). Leo has been here since last Friday and returns to Manchester tomorrow (Wednesday). Miles, who lives round the corner, has been here every day, and Lou, Jarrod and the children joined us yesterday. My house is really not big enough! Jarrod's other daughter and his dad joined us in the afternoon, so it was hanging off the rafters time. As it will be tonight, when I hold my annual what-used-to-be-called-Leftovers party. I never quite know who's coming, and one year there were only about eight of us until midnight when the hoards descended after the pub. Note to anyone who might read this who may be coming: please don't do it again!

May I take this opportunity to wish all readers and followers of the blog a very happy and hopefully prosperous new year - and let me know when you've you've read it! (There is a comments box, you know...) See you in 2012.

Dating Direct

2011-12-04T11:59:00.006Z

A long time ago I joined Dating Direct to see if there was anyone in the world who might just be a possible soulmate for me. I soon discovered there wasn't. But I wanted to use online dating in the Libby Sarjeant book I'm currently writing, Libby number ten, Murder by Magic.

So I rejoined, under a different onscreen name. Not that anyone would remember the original, it was too long ago! A friend, Danuta Kean talked me through my personal ad and suggested that I'd joined the wrong website, but I couldn't afford to pay for another subscription, so I left a free ad on the slightly more upmarket site - which has produced nothing - and carried on waiting for someone to turn up on Dating Direct. I was as honest about me as could be, as I didn't want to be using the site under false pretences, but I've decided that the men who appear on the site in my preferred age range (OK - elderly!) are completely deluded.

Now, would a young (!) woman of 50 really want to start a relationship with a wrinkled, balding man of 65? If Sean Connery was on the market it would be a different matter, but he isn't. But that's what most of these men want. And there are men who are recently separated, divorced or widowed. No - way too soon! "I lost my wife last year after thirtyfive years and think it's time to start meeting other women." In order to get the shirts washed and the dinners cooked, perhaps?

I have to be honest, the fact that I haven't found anyone I would even share a drink with is matched by the lack of interest in my own profile. Oh, yes, a lot of people view it, but no-one has yet got in touch. (No, I'm still pedant enough not to use "contact" as a verb.) But - this is not for real. And thank goodness. Because do I actually want someone else in my life? To moan about my cavalier attitude to housework, meals and television? Let's face it - no. But I really would like to know what prompts some men to be so unrealistic in their search for that elusive soulmate. Any ideas? I'd really like to know.

The Launch of Murder At The Manor

2011-11-10T12:59:00.006Z

Well, it finally escaped. Murder At The Manor is now available in a bookshop near you. Possibly. And on Amazon. Probably. Not that I have my author copies yet, but you can't have everything. Apparently there was a problem with the bar-code. Which makes me feel like a product rather than an author.

To launch it, I sent out hundreds of invitations on Facebook and Twitter, as I did for the last book, Murder To Music, and as I expect I shall for the next one, Murder By Magic. Lots of people popped in to say hello and congratulations, have a glass of virtual fizz and a piece of cake. The canapes went down well, too. Last Saturday, coincidentally, I was the guest of the Whitstable Book Club at their 25th Anniversary celebration, which fitted in nicely. I was given champagne, wine, lunch and a book token, just for burbling on about books for an hour. Also a cupcake, made by a friend of mine, Val Tilley, in home made cake cases made of that Penguin Titles wrapping paper, and surmounted by a tiny little book with the dates "1986 - 2011" on the front in gold. I have taken a picture, but can't manage to download it, technically challenged as I am.

I also did the infamous "Blog Tour", which means being guest blogger on other people's blogs or being interviewed on their blogs. My favourite is the Monty and Rosie Blog which is also going to appear permanently on my website. For some reason, Blogger is not publishing the link, although I have done it just as they ask! It's the blog home of my friend Susan Alison, who created the lovely map which now appears in the front of every book and on my website. I'd love you to take a look and tell Susan how much you like it.

And so, onwards and upwards. Next up, Murder By Magic, available next June. I am currently battling with it, having already discovered I'd made a mistake about the murder method. Good job I found out now - right at the beginning, rather than...shudder.

Success for Rhythmix!!!

2011-10-27T08:00:00.001Z

I know hardly anybody read my blog yesterday, but I'd just like to say that the charity won, and my friend Russell, who is the regional co-ordinator, has been all over the radio this morning. Go Russ and Rhythmix.

A plea for compassion and sense

2011-10-25T09:38:00.002Z

This press release has come out today. A friend of mine works for this charity, and it has already done them some damage. I urge all my followers (Hello? Anyone out there?) to make their feelings known. (If they're the right feelings, of course!)

On 23 September 2011, Simco (a company owned in large part by Simon Cowell) lodged an application in Europe to trademark the name "Rhythmix" for use by the programme X Factor. At the time of lodging that application, X Factor and Simco were fully aware that "Rhythmix" was an existing trademarked name of a music charity that works with vulnerable young people. Rather than seeking any discussion with the Charity, considering any of the moral implications of their actions, or checking with the Charity whether the pursuit of an exclusive trademark might have any negative impact on the activities of the Charity, Simco and their legal representatives sought a way to use the law to circumvent the trademark of the Charity.

The two questions for X Factor, ITV, Syco, Simco, Freemantle and Talkback Thames are simple:

1. You knew it was a music charity working with very vulnerable young people, so why did you try to take the name, aggressively seeking to limit the use of the name by the Charity by lodging applications to grant you the exclusive right to record, create promotional items and even use the word in printed media?

2. If you thought it wasn't going to be a problem, now you know it is. Professional people who work in this field are telling you it is. The media are telling you it is. The public are telling you it is. Why have you so far failed to make a public statement clearly laying out your reasons why you need to keep the name.... or why do you not simply change the name?

On the 14th October, Simco and the other parties connected to the show claimed to be having an urgent meeting to deal with this and that they would come back to the Charity on or about 17th October. This morning (24th October), the Charity have received another holding letter from legal representatives for the programme, claiming to need further time to consider their position.

Rhythmix the music charity feel that it is a reasonable supposition that instead of dealing with this promptly and reasonably the various parties connected to the programme are intent on delaying discussions about this matter until either a) the group are removed from the show by the audience or b) Simco's claim to the trademark is granted whilst the parties are supposedly discussing what to do about it. Unfortunately, this tactic by Simco means that the Charity has no option other than to pursue the legal means available to it to object to their trademark application, at a financially unjustifiable cost that Simco are fully aware of but refuse to act to mitigate.

There has been some suggestion across social media that the Charity should regard this situation as a publicity opportunity, with some fans of the programme stating that the charity should be grateful for the publicity being given to it by X Factor. Without going into the inappropriateness of the publicity offered by a connection to X Factor for a music charity that works with very vulnerable young people we would draw everybody’s attention to the fact that X Factor and Simco have not actually offered one single publicity opportunity at all to the charity and that all the publicity and good will that has been generated to date has been created by independent people through the press, media, social media and public support. Awareness and publicity for this issue is being spread because the public think it's wrong. The matter was raised on the ITV programme Xtra Factor on 23 October by the band Rizzle Kicks, and was immediately covered up by the presenters and floor managers:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UMnxFavfMFE

The Nirvana for Xmas no 1 campaign (http://www.facebook.com/nirvanaforno1) was created in response to Simco's actions. It is fast approaching 60,000 likes. The Rhythmix Facebook (http://www.facebook.com/RhythmixMusicCharity) page has soared to over 2k likes. A private group of social media gurus and online activists (Raging for Rhythmix - http://www.facebook.com/groups/150197561745614/) is in direct contact with the charity and helping Rhythmix on a number of fronts.

If you want to support Rhythmix, and you haven’t already done so please

1) Share this statement

2) Go to our facebook and like us - http://www.facebook.com/RhythmixMusicCharity

3) Follow us on Twitter - http://twitter.com/RhythmixMusic and get tweeting - anything that includes our @RhythmixMusic #Rhythmix #xfactor #changethename

4) Please donate some money to help us fight this - any money not used in the legal battle will be used to do what we do everyday - help vulnerable young people make music - http://fb.me/100C1MbNq

5) Join Raging for Rhythmix and help the Charity protect it's identity:http://www.facebook.com/groups/150197561745614/

The Charity wants to put it on record that we wish Jesy, Perrie, Leigh Ann and Jade the very best of luck and hope they do well under a new name. Could we please ask fans of the four and supporters of any pro-charity campaign to respect the fact that Rhythmix is a charity that works almost exclusively with children and young people when making comments.

Fifteen minutes of fame

2011-10-13T08:41:00.005Z

Recently, I have had a spate of publicity. First, it was Kent Life, then it was Writer's Forum and finally the Daily Express. Sorry, Blogger doesn't seem to be letting me post links. The Daily Express feature was to tie in with a series coming to BBC about Pan Am air stewardesses in the 1960s. Although I was a BOAC stewardess, they wanted me, too. And as a result of that, The One Show got in touch, filmed me on Tuesday and showed the interview last night, Wednesday 12th October, currently available on iplayer. Unfortunately, they didn't mention the fact that I wrote books, which was really why I said I'd do it, although the Express, bless them, called me a "bestselling novelist". As publisher Hazel said, I am Accent Press's best selling novelist, so not exactly a lie!

Now open to offers of appearances from all TV channels. NO? Oh, well. At least I'm doing the Adderbury Crime Festival on Saturday.

Goodbye Manor, Hello Magic

2011-08-31T10:21:00.002Z

I've finally sent off Murder at The Manor to my patient editor, and now await revisions. Now I have to start Murder By Magic which is due to be delivered in January, so not long. I've decided I really must plan this one, instead of flying into the mist.

Added to this, I also accepted an assignment to do a report on a new reader's ts (for money, not for free!), which I found extremely difficult, and a contracted novella. After completing the report and trying for ten days accompanied by two boomerang migraines, I gave in and asked to be excused from the contract for the novella, which was not in a genre I have ever considered before. I shouldn't have accepted in the first place, knowing I wasn't comfortable with the content, but there were royalties for print, ebook and audio dangled in front of my eyes.

Meanwhile, third child Phillipa is temporarily home, flitting in and out like an elongated butterfly before returning to the Caribbean to entertain the troops - sorry, the Americans. And on Saturday and Sunday, I will once more don the Pearlies and be off to the Faversham Hop Festival.

Feedback required

2011-07-25T07:53:00.004Z

This photograph is of a lovely young lady called Hannah Rogers and me. And this is the press release that went out with it:

" Here We Are Again ‘‘ As Deputy Head Brings to school Her Childhood Play by Local Author

Whitstable author, Lesley Cookman, was guest of honour as Lorenden Preparatory School revived her play for their end-of-term production.

Hannah Rogers, Deputy Head of Lorenden, in Painter's Forstal, Faversham, fondly remembered the play " Here We Are Again,'' about wartime hop pickers in Kent, from her own school days as a pupil at Whitstable County Junior School.

Hannah said: "As the children have been studying World War II this term it sprang to mind, and so I got in contact with Lesley to ask if we could borrow the script."

Lesley said: " I was very honoured when Hannah, who had been in the original production as a child of 11 asked if I still had the script, and could she use it for a production at Lorenden. When I actually came to see it, I was overwhelmed. The beautiful ration book programme, the shining letters above the stage, the posters - all had me quite emotional before they started, and then - well! I had a lump in my throat all the way through, and I can honestly say I've never felt so proud. And the presentation of a completely unexpected bouquet was the icing on the cake."

It's the tradition at Lorenden to invite local friends from the community to watch the children perform the summer musical, though we don't usually have them writing the script as well! '' Said Hannah.

Now to something else on which I really do want feedback. Recently on the RNA members email group we've been discussing self promotion and social networking. These days, publishers, especially small publishers, have very little to spend on marketing and promotion unless the author is a bestseller. RNA president (and friend of mine!) Katie Fforde is one of these, as is another friend, Jill Mansell. Their books go straight into the supermarket and straight into the charts, something most of the rest of us can only dream about.

So we get our internet presence. I was lucky in that before the Libby books started, I already had a website, thanks to Brian, who was one of the very first Apple trainers (Apple Macintosh, as they were quaintly known then, not Cox's Orange Pippin) in this country over twenty years ago, so we, as a family, were ahead of the game as far as t'internet was concerned.

But it was at the suggestion of my publishers that I joined Facebook, and subsequently Twitter, and as far as I remember, started this blog. Just to prove how timewasting they all are, I just went back to the beginning to see when that was (October 2006) and ended up reading several old posts.

What we all want to know is: is all this social networking helping our sales? Do people get fed up with seeing our statuses (stati?) complaining about deadlines, shopping, cats etc? And do they mind if we say "Look! I've got a book out today!"? I have to say my online launch of the last Libby went really well and shoved my launch day sales at Amazon right up the lists, but I don't do it very often.

If I see constant promotion on Twitter and Facebook I unfriend or unfollow. What we all want to know is do readers also find that a turn off, and do readers enjoy seeing our silly little status posts? I shall post this on Facebook and Twitter, and I really, really want feedback. This will probably be shooting myself in the foot, but never mind.

Please post a comment wherever you read this - if you do, of course. Or if you have. If you haven't I'm not actually talking to you, am I? Oh, dear.

A Will To Love

2011-07-18T08:27:00.002Z

The second Rosina Lesley book is out and people I know are downloading it. This is Scary. It was actually quite exciting to attend the Romantic Novelists' Association conference last weekend as a bono fido romance author, and the buzz - and a lot of the sessions - were about epublishing, so I fitted right in. Met a lot of old friends and some new ones and should have come home fired up, but instead had chronic conference lag. However, I'm back to schedule now, and with a bit of luck and the traditional following wind I should get Murder at The Manor in on time.

I was extremely flattered over the weekend to be asked to become a reader for a literary advisory service. Now, there are a proliferating number of these, but this particular one is one of the originals and extremely well respected. I feel as if I've arrived! I've also been asked to write a piece for a magazine and a guest blog on a US Mystery blog. (No, the blog's not a mystery - it's about mysteries. Get a grip.)

In a future blog I will tell you all about another nice thing that happened - not earth shattering, but quite lovely.

Metamorphosis and Boat Trips

2011-06-23T09:54:00.007Z

OK, here it is: the first Rosina Lesley to be published. The first review, on a US review site more used to reviewing erotica, is a bit odd, saying that she didn't like the main characters but loved the book ?!?!?! I think it's because they're 80s characters and don't behave the same as the current heroes and heroines do. You wouldn't believe there was such a difference in such a short time, would you?

In other news, I am doing a talk with fellow author Nina Bell in Faversham tomorrow on How To Get Published, for the very first Faversham Festival. This is not the Faversham Hop Festival, in which I take part every year, but a new venture with dozens of different events.

And, of course, I've been back to Turkey. No, I couldn't afford it, but I'd paid for the flight in January and I couldn't waste it, could I? While there we watched the perfect Lunar Eclipse - on the beach with wine in hand, brilliant - and had the boat trip from hell. Well, it wasn't really, but it was jolly exciting. George and Timmy would have loved it - Ann wouldn't.

The boats would never pass Elf'n'safety in the UK, but we enjoy them. The "Captains" all do the cooking - fresh fish, salad and the best chips in the world on Hassan's little boat, which was the one we were on. And he heard that the wind had blown up in our home bay while we were lunching in another one, so we waited as long as we could before setting off home. And then we hit the wind.

Have you seen those programmes of deep sea fishing where the boats dive 10 feet down into the waves and a 10 foot wave then crashes over them? Without lifebelts? Yep - that was it. At first it was quite exciting, until we were all soaked, so was everything on board and we were hanging on for dear life. How no-one went over I've no idea. Then, of course, we couldn't get into harbour and had to get to a little cove where we could get fairly near the shore and yes - we waded. And THEN, we had to climb up a cliff. Now remember - I have arthritis and osteoporosis. Cliff climbing in sandals is not something I do regularly.

Luckily I had a real life hero in friend Louise's husband Mike, who hauled me up without accident. I kept thanking my lucky stars I'd got decent travel insurance.

Hassan had called ahead and got the mini-market owner, Kadir, whom we all knew, to come along and pick us up at the top of the cliff. I should think he had to clean the vehicle inside and out afterwards.

Apart from that, the holiday was most enjoyable as usual, and on the last day I got an email from the panto publishers saying my royalties from them had been paid into my account, so holiday was paid for. Relief.

Also managed 1000 words a day while out there of next Libby book, so felt very self-righteous. Will update with cover of second Rosina book soon...

Romantic News

2011-05-30T08:28:00.003Z

No, I haven't suddenly met the man of my dreams. At my age that's a little unlikely, wouldn't you say?

No - but after years of belonging to the Romantic Novelists' Association under false colours, I am finally to be published in Romance! Fancy that. Accent Press have the terrifically successful Xcite imprint which sells - ahem - erotic fiction. Lots of anthologies of every sort of eroticism you can think of: http://www.erotica-romance-ebooks.com/ but they have now started selling romantic novels, too. And they've bought two of my old ones! I had to go through them and replace "stereo" with "ipod" etc, but one of them has now been edited and I read the final draft on my Kindle yesterday. Very odd, reading my own book on my Kindle. I'm using the pen name Rosina Lesley, which is my own name, of course, but very much more romantic than Lesley Cookman.

Felt very embarrassed, as I've known the Xcite editor for some years now in real life, but apparently I didn't disgrace myself. This one, called Running Away, will be out in time for the Romantic Novelists' Association conference in July, at which I shall be taking part in a panel, so I shall spend the weekend with a split personality.

As soon as I have a cover, I shall put it up to be sniggered over.

Murder to Music launch at the London Book Fair

2011-04-12T11:54:00.004Z

I had a terrific day at the London Book Fair with my publisher, Hazel Cushion of Accent Press. There were little bags with the picture of the Murder to Music cover on them containing copies of the book, a book mark and an Accent catalogue, which were given away to interested bystanders (whether they wanted them or not!) and I got happy hand ache signing. On the wall behind me was a huge poster of all my covers, so I felt like a star.

I've had a mini blog tour over the past few days, and if you haven't anything better to do, here are the links:
http://itsacrime.typepad.com/ A guest blog on the It's A Crime site.
http://forbookssake.net/2011/04/08/five-minute-friday-lesley-cookman/ Mini interview on the For Books' Sake site
http://www.janicehortonwriter.blogspot.com/ Interview on writer Janice Horton's blog
http://writerschecklist.blogspot.com/ Interview on writer Maureen Vincent-Northam's blog
http://stuartaken.blogspot.com/ Interview on writer Stuart Aken's blog

There are another couple to come, including a Skype interview - scary. And I had a virtual launch on Facebook, which was huge fun and I had so many lovely people raising virtual glasses of fizz. So all-in-all, the best launch day I've had. And thank you to Hazel and Accent for continuing to publish me - there are two more in the pipeline!

The gentle Face of Crime

2011-03-24T12:04:00.003Z

Recently, crime writer Catherine Aird, author of the Calleshire series, starring Sloan and Crosby, hosted a lunch for four other gentle, modest ladies of a certain age. They were Amy Myers, author of the Marsh and Daughter series and the new Jack Colby series (among others), Susan Moody, author of the Penny Wanawake and Cassandra Swann series (among others) Joan Lock, author of the Detective Inspector Ernest Best series (among others) and me. Amy's husband, Jim, took the picture and is very involved in the new Jack Colby series. To look at us, you'd never think we were such a murderous lot, would you?

Once more unto the blog, my friends

2011-02-18T14:23:00.002Z

Very late, of course.

After a frantic six weeks after Christmas I managed to send Murder to Music off to the publishers, from whom I'm expecting a mass of revisions any day.

Not much to report apart from that. I have already got the outline of the next due out in November and as yet untitled, and have a signing lined up in Tunbridge Wells on April 23rd at Waterstones, an author workshop at The Faversham Festival sometime in June, and I shall be guest of honour at a local book group's 25th anniversary in November.

I'm also hoping to organise a blog tour to promote Murder to Music, so if anyone reads this and would like me to pop in, let me know!

Christmas Past

2010-12-28T08:52:00.002Z

Funny thing about Christmas. When it's just gone you breathe a sigh of relief and wonder why you bothered, yet come next October you're planning the next one. At least, that's what it's like for me.

I've realised, over the past few days, that I rely too heavily on my grown-up children at Christmas. The thought that they might NOT come home for The Day turns my stomach to water and makes my blood run cold. Yet what happens when they've all got families and want to spend the time at home? Even my elder daughter brings her lot to my house on Boxing Day and we end up crammed into my small, cluttered house having to eat a buffet lunch because there's no room round the table.

My late husband and I hosted Christmas for my parents and his aunt and uncle (surrogate grandparents for the children) from very early on. There were the odd ones where we spent them with my parents or aunt and uncle, like the Christmas immediately after my father died, or when aunt and uncle were in Australia, but mostly it was everybody to ours! And they stayed overnight, too. It was easier that way, everybody could have a drink and the children loved it.

Later when we moved to Whitstable, we used to go and fetch Aunt on Christmas Eve (3 hour round trip) and take her back the day after Boxing Day. My mum was either living with us or up the road by then.

So, for around 35 years, I've had Christmas. The traditions grow up and change, inevitably, because I no longer have four children clambering into bed with me on Christmas morning. Instead, it's after we've had our first glass of fizz that we open our presents. And, for the last 23 years, we've had what started life as the Leftovers Party on the 27th, but is just Mum's Party now. The guest list has changed but there are always guitars involved. At least, I assumed so. But, again, I realised things have changed and there will probably be no more parties on the 27th.

And my children have changed. I now find the old role reversal in play, and I really didn't expect that until I was at least 75! But change happens, and we have to expect it and accept it. I suppose if I still had a husband it would be different, but I don't think there's any danger of a new one on the horizon at my age - would I want one? Er - no.

So I'll go back to being mad old cat lady who writes books. And try and ignore next Christmas until it thrusts itself upon me and I come out with the inevitable "Um, will you be here for Christmas Day this year?"

Funny thing about Christmas. Makes you think.

The Government's Wasting Money - What?

2010-12-03T07:42:00.003Z

Well, there we are. We didn't get the World Cup. Oh, never mind, we're spending millions on the Olympics. Debt? What debt?

Oh yes, the Olympics are REALLY good for us. They're encouraging children to do better at sport. Local authoritites and schools are improving their sports facilities beyond imagining, not, it has to be said, just for the benefit of the children or the local athletes, but, certainly in my area of wealthy (ha!) south eastern Britain, because they want other countries to train in them. So, they are spending thousands, nay, millions, just at the time the Government, bless its cotton socks, has cut every budget possible.

No-one has yet explained to me why, when apparently we can lend Ireland millions, spend billions (non-recoverable) on the Olympics and spend a fortune on sending Cameron, Beckham and William to an expensive and failing jolly, the ordinary man or woman in the street, which is most of us, are going to suffer from the "cuts", in some cases to the danger of our health, homes and families.

And education? Fees? Don't talk to me about fees. I have one child who is still in debt - and will be for years unless she wins the lottery - and they want to charge more. And what is it Osborne keeps saying? It isn't a debt? It's just a future tax. Well, that's exactly what student debt is now, and we still call it debt.

Yes, cuts are necessary. But not wholesale. You prune a tree, you don't cut off all the branches at once. It certainly won't leaf, flower or fruit if you do that, not for years, and meanwhile you have disposessed hundreds of creatures, birds, insects and small mammals which will now die. Or just nip off to the next tree, of course, except that we don't have a "next tree".

Nick Clegg and his party have lost any credibility they may have once had, and might just as well fold their tents in the night and be gone. The Conservatives appear to be trying to return us to a class system moribund since World War Two. Labour - well, ants without an anthill.

I'm not a political commentator, but I have never felt this angry before. I'm a traditional English woman who loves her country, by which I mean I love our towns, our countryside, our seaside, our people and, in the main, the way we do things. When we're allowed to.

There was a lot of talk at the last election about "Using it or Losing it" referring to our votes. Well, if using my vote has resulted in this mess, I don't think I'll bother next time.

The Green Carnation Prize Winner 2010

2010-12-01T09:41:00.000Z

The Green Carnation Prize Winner 2010
After many hours of discussion and lively debate (and not a tantrum in sight) the judges have managed to whittle down the five shortlisted books for ‘The Green Carnation Prize 2010’ and have come up with their winner…
Paperboy by Christopher Fowler
‘Superman, Dracula, The Avengers, Treasure Island...when you’re ten years old, you can fall in love with any story so long as it’s a good one. But what if you’re growing up in a house without books?
Christopher Fowler's memoir captures life in suburban London as it has rarely been seen: through the eyes of a lonely boy who spends his days between the library and the cinema, devouring novels, comics, cereal packets - anything that might reveal a story. But it’s 1960, and after fifteen years of post-war belt-tightening, his family is not ready to indulge a child cursed with too much imagination...
Caught between an ever-sensible but exhausted mother and a DIY-obsessed father fighting his own demons, Christopher takes refuge in words. His parents try to understand their son’s peculiar obsessions, but fast lose patience with him - and each other. The war of nerves escalates to include every member of the Fowler family, and something has to give, but does it mean that a boy must always give up his dreams for the tough lessons of real life? Beautifully written, this rich and astute evocation of a time and a place recalls a childhood at once eccentric and endearingly ordinary.’

The judges Paul Magrs, Nick Campbell, Lesley Cookman, Katy Manning and Simon Savidge have had a tough time: they thought any of the five books could have won, so it was no easy mission. Simon Savidge who will be taking over as Chair in 2011 said “it was such a difficult decision, each book had its own strengths. ‘God Says No for putting you into the mind set of someone I never thought I could understand and enraging you and making you laugh out loud, London Triptych for its characters (one of which might just be my favourite character of the year) and historical feel over the generations, Children of the Sun for being an importantly disturbing and shocking tale and Man’s World for its humour, emotion and more.’
Yet in the end they were all agreed that Paperboy, which is a memoir with a delightful fictional feel in parts as he writes in the voices of those he remembers. Paul Magrs Chair of the judges for 2010 said 'Paperboy is about the forming of a gay sensibility - but more than that, it's about the growth of a reader and a wonderfully generous and inventive writer. It's a great wodge of social history - of back-to-back houses, plasticine models and exercise books, and how Lois Lane's adventures were always more interesting than Superman's. It's modest, funny and brilliant.'

About The Prize
This year a new literary prize for works of fiction and memoirs by gay men was introduced… Judged by a glittering panel of writers, bloggers and readers ‘The Green Carnation Prize’ is probably the first of its kind in the UK and one we hope will go from strength to strength in future years to come…
The Green Carnation Prize was born when suddenly it was literary award season again and longlists were getting bandied about like crazy. And we thought – wouldn’t it be fun and great to do something a bit different?
And then we thought – there’s no prize yet for gay men’s books in the UK. That’s a scandalous thought. There ought to be something that celebrates and publicizes the breadth and variety of their work. Writing by gay men can be funny, exciting, harrowing, uplifting and challenging – and it can range right across the genres. It can also be created by men from all classes and races.
So here we are – this small panel of co-founders and judges – setting ourselves the somewhat daunting task of looking at what the queer fellas have brought out this year.
There’s no prize money in this… Maybe a bit of kudos for the winner! There’s simply our love and devotion as well, of course – and a bit of shouting about the writing we love. Maybe one day we’ll get sponsorship or something. We also hope we can draw attention to some great male authors that definitely need to be read no matter what your sexuality.
The Green Carnation Prize 2011
Yes, the winner of The Green Carnation Prize 2010 has only just been announced but already plans are in progress for the second year. Publishers will be being contacted with the new submission dates and deadlines after New Year and a new judging panel, with some familiar faces will be announced within the next fortnight.
You can find further information on the website http://greencarnationprize.wordpress.com including more on our delightful judging panel and further updates on events and additional announcements.
Contact Information
For further information, images or any other enquiries please email greencarnationprize@gmail.com

Green Carnation, The Write Place and The Blue Bear!

2010-11-02T11:19:00.002Z

The short list for the Green Carnation Prize has been revealed and garnered, again, no publicity from either the broadsheets or the trade press. What are they waiting for? The short list, a mix of debut novels and those more established writers, reflect the tastes of the judges and is as follows

Paperboy – Christopher Fowler (Bantam Books)
God Says No – James Hannaham (McSweeneys)
London Triptych – Jonathan Kemp (Myriad Editions)
Children of the Sun – Max Schaefer (Granta)
Man’s World – Rupert Smith (Arcadia Books)

All of us founder judges will be involved with next year's prize, for which we will hopefully have a sponsor. Will that make the meeja sit up and take notice? The winner will be announced on December 1st.

Last week I went to speak at The Write Place in Dartford where I baffled a crowd of aspiring writers with my in depth knowledge of publishing. Well, I told them a bit about how it happened for me, anyway. You would think, wouldn't you, that a train journey to somewhere only 45 minutes away by car would be easy. No. Two hours it took. How did two of my poor children commute there to college for two years each? Bless them. Anyway, thank you to Elaine Everest and Francesca for the bottle of wine, and Michael for the lift to and from the station.

Finally, I went to The Playhouse Whitstable last night with son Miles and daughter-in-law-elect Clare to see the great Arthur Smith supported, ably, by John Maloney, who made me cry with laughter. But however funny these gentlemen were, the high spot of the evening for me was when Arthur sang his traditional "Arthur (Simon) Smith and his amazing dancing bear" finishing song, and through the curtains came THE BLUE BEAR! This means nothing to anyone not connected to the theatre and pantomime, so I shall explain. Many years ago, A full size blue bear costume was given to the Playhouse and stored in the wardrobe. (Wardrobe, in this case, being a store, not a cupboard.) I was directing Babes inthe Wood, and inspiration struck. We would have the traditional ghost chase scene - but use the Blue Bear instead! And so we did. Stage manager Iris Manning donned the costume and the blue bear became a hit. I then used it in many more pantomimes and it suffered many indignities. It has been retired for many years now, so it was delightful to see it appear last night - and in such an illustrious presence! So thank you Pete Smith (no relation) for rescuing it and allowing its head to fall on yours. Much appreciated.

Guildford Book Festival and Cotswold Bookstore

2010-10-25T07:40:00.007Z

Last week was notable for the mileage my little car got under its bonnet. On Tuesday, my daughter Phillipa (she who has just finished at the Royal Academy of Music. And is "resting") offered to get up at the crack of dawn - or before, actually - and drive me to the Guildford Book Festival, where I was on a panel with Linda Regan, my old Bad Babes buddy, Suzette Hill and chaired by Simon Brett. No photographs, unfortunately, but we had a good time and each received a bottle of wine for our trouble. Lovely to see Simon again, as we rarely cross paths, yet always come up together on Amazon.

Then on Saturday a friend offered to drive me to Moreton-in-Marsh, where the Cotswold Bookstore was hosting a launch/signing for my latest book, Murder Imperfect. Publisher Hazel Cushion, of Accent Press, was providing wine and nibbles. I am sad to say that the RAC route I downloaded before we left was - er - pants. We ended up in Cheltenham. Luckily, my son Miles telephoned to say good luck, and I was able to ask him to look up the book shop's number. They therefore knew we would be late.

When we arrived at this really lovely book shop, one window of which was full of my books surrounding a large version of the map Susan Alison created for them, I was greeted by a cheer and applause. The shop was packed, and I was set to signing straight away. I met so many lovely people (real ones, not authors) who all bought multiple copies of the books. However the treat for me was getting together with so many friends. In the photograph above, left to right, are Susan Alison (map creator, who signed books with me) Gilli Allan, Adrian Magson (crime writer and friend) Katie Fforde, her sister Jane Gordon-Cumming and publisher Hazel Cushion. This was taken by Tony, book shop co-owner, right at the end of the event after the wine had been packed away, and many friends had already left. Also there at some point were Anita Burgh, the writer who most encouraged me well before I became a novelist, Catherine Jones, some other RNA members and Maureen Vincent-Northam, another Accent Press author. I expect I've forgotten people, but it wa a bit of a blur, and Hazel kept me well supplied with red wine. (Surprise surprise.)

I was then presented with a beautiful bouquet and a copy of the new Justin Thyme book, and Hazel took me, my friend who drove, Adrian and his wife and Hazel's two daughters who had been helping with the event, to lunch in a lovely pub. We had a lovely, stress free drive home and I collapsed on the sofa. I felt like a star, and had the best time ever. So thank you to everyone who came, to Hazel for the wine, nibbles and lunch (and for being a fab publisher) and most of all, to the Cotswold Bookstore, Tony, David and Nina, for asking me.

This week, I'm off to The Write Place, Dartford, to do a guest spot. It's all go, you know.

Murder Imperfect is out!

2010-10-16T09:10:00.006Z

Early, as usual. I only checked on Amazon because my friend Paul Magrs reported that his latest, The Bride That Time Forgot, due on October 28th, was there. Never mind, at least that means it'll be available when I do the Crime and Coffee event at the Guildford Book Festival on Tuesday with Simon Brett, Suzette Hill and Linda Regan.

Also, next Saturday I have my very first proper launch/signing at the Cotswold Bookstore in Moreton-in-Marsh. A strange venue for books set in Kent, but they "discovered" me due to my similarity (!) to the Agatha Raisin books and I've sold quite well, apparently. They've done a feature window with a large copy of my lovely Steeple Martin map, specially done for me by the artist, Susan Alison. I'm going to bring it home and hang it on the wall. I'm hopeful of seeing lots of friends at the signing, as there are many RNA members lurking in the Cotswolds. I've also been fortunate enough to secure a lift from a mad friend who doesn't mind leaving at 7 in the morning. Thank you, Peter. This is A Good Thing as my lovely publisher, Hazel, is bringing wine and nibbles and I would have been seriously upset if I hadn't been able to partake.

The Thursday after that I am to be a guest speaker at The Write Place writing school in Dartford, on November 1st we are announcing the short list for The Green Carnation Prize and on November 11th I'm on a panel at the Folkestone Literary Festival with Thomas Emson (who happens to be married to an old friend, Marnie Summerfield Smith) and Danuta Kean, industry commentator and all round good person. Finally, on December 1st we announce the winner of the Green Carnation, hopefully at the Cadogan Hotel. OK, who gets the connection?

So, busy, busy, busy and still trying to work on the second version of Murder to Music, which has to be with the publishers by the end of December (manic laughter) for publication on April 11th 2011. It is the first of the three book deal announced at the London Book Fair earlier this year and the cover is here:

Also, back at the London Book Fair, Hazel negotiated a deal with an Australian distributor, who reports that I'm selling quite well down under. That's nice. Also a new deal with a US distributor who is pushing me at the Americans. All good. Why aren't I a millionaire?

Oh, and the other thing, my nice webmistress, Aimee Fry, has revamped my website for me, so if anyone reads this, could they let me know what they think? And of everything else, of course!

The Green Carnation Longlist

2010-09-02T10:17:00.004Z

On Tuesday evening, 31st August, the four judges of the Green Carnation Prize, (l to r) Simon Savidge, Lesley Cookman, Paul Magrs and Nick Campbell, met for dinner in Bloomsbury and decided, amid much wine and laughter, and a few differences of opinion, on the all important longlist. Here it is:

Generation A by Douglas Coupland (Windmill Books)
Bryant and May Off the Rails by Christopher Fowler (Doubleday)
Paperboy by Christopher Fowler (Doubleday)
In A Strange Room by Damon Galgut (Atlantic Books)
God Says No by James Hannaham (McSweeney’s)
London Triptych by Jonathan Kemp (Myriad Editions)
Mary Ann in Autumn by Armistead Maupin (Doubleday)
Children of the Sun by Max Schaefer (Granta)
Man’s World by Rupert Smith (Arcadia Books)
The Slap by Christos Tsiolkas (Tuskar Rock Press)
City Boy by Edmund White (Bloomsbury)

Congratulations to all the authors - and the publishers - and I wish you could all end up on the short list, which will be announced on November 1st.

The Green Carnation

2010-07-31T10:14:00.004Z

This week a new literary prize has emerged. It all started when the Man Booker long list was announced and a friend of mine, the writer Paul Magrs, whose review of Murder in Steeple Martin can be found through a link in a previous post, asked why there wasn't a prize for gay male fiction called (ahem) The Man Fooker Prize. Twitter took it up in a mild way, I of course, thinking it was a great idea, and then Paul said "You'll be a judge, won't you, Lesley?" And suddenly, it was real.

Over the week, Simon Savidge, London editor of Bent Magazine and a fellow judge, got together a website, Paul, Simon, I and Nick Campbell, the fourth judge, worked on getting the name out there and asking publishers and publications to back us. We began to get a cautious response, but, surprise, surprise, we uncovered a hitherto unsuspected nervousness among publishers. There were many reasons why, eventually, we were brought to accept that if we wanted the award to succeed, we needed to change the name. So we did. In a nod to the great Wilde it has been renamed ‘The Green Carnation Prize’. I am, naturally, very thrilled to be part of this, although my reading plans, especially when I'm on holiday in Turkey, will be severely compromised! Please, if you read my blog, put the word about. We will announce the winner, probably in London, on December 1st, World Aids Day. Watch this space!

Sometimes, nice things happen

2010-07-23T11:53:00.003Z

This week, having sent off Murder Imperfect to my long suffering editor last week, I had a couple of days off, cleared out the office and the understairs cupboard and discovered I have a new deadline for a new book, Murder to Music, due out next April.

A few weeks ago, I sent a large parcel to son Leo in Manchester. It never arrived, and all attempts to trace it have failed. This morning - guess what? A large parcel in a blue plastic bag arrived addressed to the Occupier. Inside was my parcel - all wrappings ripped to glory, but contents intact. Well done - I think - Royal Mail. As one of the things in the parcel was a framed photograph of my parents before they married, I was delighted to receive it.

Another Nice Thing was, as Philly and her friends, Katie and Ender arrived on my doorstep this morning, so did the local paper. And there was a double page spread of the Marlowe Theatre pantomime, including Katie as Maid Marion, and in the blurb, Philly and I both get a mention. (Helps when you know the panto company's administrator.)

Leo in Manchester has sorted out his differences at work, and Lou is looking forward to her appearance at the Vintage at Goodwood festival in a posh frock. And the custom built guitar pedal I ordered for Miles's birthday (in May) has finally arrived. Sometimes, nice things happen.

Shows, Graduations and Conferences

2010-07-12T12:15:00.003Z

Since my last post there have been three Notable Events. All of them in London and occasioning Very Bad Feet. The first was daughter Phillipa's final show at the Royal Academy of Music. She played Sarah Jane Moore in Sondheim's Assassins and was, of course, brilliant. So she can act, now? I couldn't walk the following day.

Next, the graduation. Held in St Marylebone Church, a beautiful building right opposite the Academy. Best friend Elly's dad Graham and I were the chosen two and travelled up at the crack of sparrows to be seated at 9. The ceremony began at 10 15, but we were entertained by the Academy's Brass ensemble, which was superb. Apart from the graduands, Fellowships and Memberships of the Academy were introduced by the wonderfully voiced John Suchet and we were treated to a terrific jazz tuba piece by one of the honours students. After all the pomp and circumstance everything went a bit to pot, as there were free drinks in the Duke's Hall. Needless to say, our little group, now enhanced by two other members of Philly's course, a twin and a mother, were the last to leave having consumed our own bodyweight in wine. We managed to get to Pizza Express to have a rather late lunch, then the proud graduands left to get ready for their ball (held in the Gorilla House at London Zoo???)

Due to this once in a lifetime experience I missed my grandson's fourth birthday and got into trouble with my elder daughter.

Finally, the RNA 50th Anniversary conference. Now, I know I don't write romance, but, as I've said before, most of my mates do. So off I went, again at sparrow's, and eventually dragged myself and case from Greenwich Station to the conference venue at the farthest point of the Royal Naval College on the hottest day of the year. I, my feet, knees and hips were complaining bitterly by this time and it was only ten o'clock! My friend Bernardine nobly agreed to show me where the accomodation was after lunch. This turned out to be In Greenwich. Not on site. Off we went. Then back we went to listen to the inestimable Carole Blake, agent extraordinaire (unfortunately not mine). Then, oh, my, back to the accomodation, whereupon Bernardine, Susan Alison (wonderful artist who drew the map for my books) and I decided to order a taxi to go to the Gala Dinner in The Trafalgar Tavern that evening rather than risk the hoi polloi of Greenwich - and the distance - in our finery.

It had been, apparently 32 degrees all day. If I could have gone home at that point, I would have done. However, the Gala Dinner was lovely, and although we didn't manage to make contact with many people (terrible crush, my dear) many friends were duly greeted.

The following day, in loose white and feeling like an Indian gentleman, off I went again on the long trek. Today, however, Bernardine, Susan, a friend from the US, Rosemary, and I appropriated a table in the courtyard and refused to move All Day. We remained cool. We attended no sessions, but received friends and admirers at our table with a gracious wave of our hands. We even decided not to go back to the accomodation before the evening bar and barbecue, also held in the courtyard. Altogether a more relaxing day.

Yesterday, morning spent in the courtyard, attended the plenary speech by Joanna Trollope, a lot of which I didn't agree with, (with which...Huh?) had lunch, back to the courtyard and then a lift all the way home with the lovely Jane Wenham-Jones, with whom I share a publisher. We shall be doing an event together for Ramsgate Arts on August Bank Holiday. Thanks, Jane.

Apart from the depredation of hips, knees and feet, three good events. If I receive any pictures, I shall upload them at a future time. I am also pleased to announce the return of son Leo to the blogosphere and online in general. And thank you, son Miles, for looking after the cats. And happy birthday Louise for tomorrow, July 13th.

Now back to the revisions.

Stereotypes

2010-06-20T11:57:00.002Z

I am conforming to a stereotype. I have, slowly and subtly, turned into a mad elderly woman writer with cats. My eldest son says I am turning into a recluse. I am depressed. And I STILL haven't finished Murder Imperfect.

This, of course, may have something to do with the depression. It's a long time since I was diagnosed with clinical depression and it was due to external reasons (can't remember the official term now) so I'm guessing it might be now, as I am not naturally a depressive. But the symptoms are vile. And the sense of persecution is appalling.

I have some experience of the illness in family members, and I have learnt the hard way not to believe everything you see. Some people are brilliant at putting on the good face. I used to tell my children when they were young that if they pretended they were being good, that's how it would look to the general public. "Play at being good while you're with Auntie Thing, and she'll think you really are!" Perhaps this is not necessarily a good thing, although if you go about with a face like a kite and refuse to talk to anybody, those around you will walk away. Possibly for ever.

So I must get myself out of it. Now, don't you go saying "Pull yourself together, Lesley, look at what you've got to be grateful for." I know, I know. And I'm sure, when I've finished the book - nearly there, now - and started going out and seeing people again I shall return to my usual self.

But there, you see. I'm conforming to the picture of the tortured writer. Who knew?

New review

2010-05-24T10:31:00.004Z

I was delighted this morning to receive a message from Paul Magrs to tell me he'd reviewed my first Libby Sarjeant book, Murder in Steeple Martin. I was even more delighted to find he was a highly respected writer and academic. His website is http://www.paulmagrs.com/(still can't do proper links) and the review is here: http://www.facebook.com/l/dc2d9;paulmagrs.com/blogs/?p=526

Having suffered from some kind of viral infection for nearly two weeks, I got even more behind with Murder Imperfect, but I'm on the home straight at last. Perhaps it would be A Good Thing to get on with the next one as soon as this one's gone off!

Deadlines, LBF and contracts

2010-05-13T10:35:00.002Z

Murder In The Green came out early and has received very good feedback. Hazel Cushion, the MD of my publishers, Accent Press, invited me to their party at the London Book Fair, an event sadly depleted by the cloud of volcanic ash preventing overseas editors and agents from galloping in with cheque books in hand. However, the party was good, we went on to dinner and I got drunk. Telling people at home was odd - they were all surprised. I have an unfortunately good tolerance of alcohol...

Good thing was, I have been offered a new three book contract over two years following publication of the next book, Murder Imperfect, due out in October. Bad thing is, deadline for said book has been brought forward, as they want it out at the BEGINNING of October, not the end. So I'm currently buried in the office with a "Go Away" message on the answerphone.

My son, Leo, has gone back to Manchester to work, daughter Phillipa is just embarking on the very last phase of her course at the Royal Academy of Music, where she is playing the lead in the Sondheim show "Assassins" for the end of term production. Son Miles and daughter Louise are still more-or-less where they were, except that Louise is beginning to work again. Last weekend two gigs with her old band the Pasadena Roof Orchestra. So good luck to all, and I'll try and remember to post more regular updates!

How Publishing Really Works

2010-03-13T09:39:00.005Z

There is a terrific blog of this name, read by many in the publishing business, including authors and aspiring authors. The lovely lady who runs it, Jane, had her arm twisted up her back to persuade her to allow me to contribute, which I have now done. You can read my post here. Any of my nearest and dearest who take issue with anything I've said (Lies! Lies! It's all Lies!) please email me privately!

A bereavement in the extended family caused a couple of weeks of upset, made worse by coming, as it did, on certain anniversaries. I intend to make up for it beginning tomorrow, Mother's Day. Actually, starting tonight, as I'm going to a party. Mother's Day tomorrow, and will see 3 out of 4 children, as dd1 has her own children now. I have, however, sent her a card. Monday, jollies at the theatre with friends while my mate Ali auditions people for her variety show in the summer. Well, we are a seaside theatre company. Just because we haven't got a pier...

Tuesday's a big day. I shall be attending the Romantic Novelists' Association Awards lunch, sitting with my friend Christina Jones and meeting up with many others. There have been pictures on here of previous occasions, where I look somewhat - um - tired and emotional. This year, however, I won't have the chance, as instead of going to the pub afterwards and falling out in time for the last train, I have to hot-foot it back to Whitstable as I'm going to see Barry Cryer in the evening with family and friends. We have now seen Harry Hill (who will be coming back in June), Jo Brand and Paul Merton over the last few months, courtesy of a Whitstable newcomer, Nick Wilty, himself a comedian. We are now comedy capital of Kent. Pleasing alliteration.

Wednesday I shall go back into my shell and get back to work. Murder Imperfect is at last going reasonably well, although still only on Chapter Eight, and I've got ideas rattling round for the next one already.

Once again, could I ask anyone who reads this blog (anyone? At all? No?) to comment below? Otherwise, I have absolutely no idea if it's worth it! And "no comments" makes me feel like Wilhelmina no-mates.

Possible update after Bank Holiday Monday, when Murder in the Green escapes into the wider world. See you then.

Another rant against everything

2010-02-09T12:01:00.002Z

Is it something to do with the election? Is the government trying to prove that it knows better than we do, that the rule book grows longer and longer as if it's some hidebound boarding school? Dads must not carry children on their shoulders. OK - in some circumstances that is dangerous, but surely only the thickest (and no, I'm not going to apologise) dads will do that in, say, supermarkets or railway stations.

Over the last weeks there have been more nonsensical "laws" being postulated than in almost any other time in the last ten years. For goodness' sake, why don't they just shut everything down and ask the people? We live in a democracy which is fast becoming an autocracy, in which Big Brother (the original, Wayne) is a mere baby step away.

This blog is supposed to be about me and writing. As an author/writer/novelist (there has been some discussion on the title amongst fellow authors/writers/novelists) I take a mild, if irritated, interest in the doings of the supposedly great and good. But it is becoming increasingly angry, see both of the last two posts. Spleen is being vented and I want someone to take notice. Someone who is in some position to Do Something About It.
All comments addressed to Gordon Brown, please.

BUREAUCRAPSY

2010-02-02T11:38:00.003Z

This morning I received an email forwarded to me by a friend, who, on having read my little rant of last week, thought it might strike a chord. It did of course. Here it is:

FOR ALL LOVERS OF BUREAUCRAPSY .

Don't you wish that you had written this?

This was actually taken from a passport application and a member of staff copied it, as it made her laugh all day.

Dear Minister,
I'm in the process of renewing my passport but I am a total loss to understand or believe the hoops I am being asked to jump through.

How is it that Bert Smith of T.V. Rentals Basingstoke has my address and telephone number and knows that I bought a satellite dish from them back in 1994, and yet, the Government is still asking me where I was born and on what date?

How come that nice West African immigrant chappy who comes round every Thursday night with his DVD rentals van can tell me every film or video I have had out since he started his business up eleven years ago, yet you still want me to remind you of my last three jobs, two of which were with contractors working for the government?

How come the T.V. detector van can tell if my T.V. is on, what channel I am watching and whether I have paid my licence or not, and yet if I win the government run lottery they have no idea I have won or where I am and will keep the bloody money to themselves if I fail to claim in good time.
Do you people do this by hand?

You have my birth date on numerous files you hold on me, including the one with all the income tax forms I've filed for the past 30-odd years. It's on my health insurance card, my driver's licence, on the last four passports I've had, on all those stupid customs declaration forms I've had to fill out before being allowed off the planes and boats over the last 30 years, and all those insufferable census forms that are done every ten years and the electoral registration forms I have to complete, by law, every time our lords and masters are up for re-election.

Would somebody please take note, once and for all, I was born in Margate on the 4th of March 1957, my mother's name is Mary, her maiden name was Bloggs, my father's name is Robert, and I'd be absolutely astounded if that ever changed between now and the day I die!

I apologise Minister. I'm obviously not myself this morning. But between you and me, I have simply had enough! You mail the application to my house, then you ask me for my address. What is going on? Do you have a gang of Neanderthals working there? Look at my damn picture. Do I look like Bin Laden? I don't want to activate the Fifth Reich for God's sake! I just want to go and park my weary backside on a sunny, sandy beach for a couple of week's well-earned rest away from all this crap.

Well, I have to go now, because I have to go to back to Salisbury and get another copy of my birth certificate because you lost the last one. AND to the tune of 60 quid! What a racket THAT is!! Would it be so complicated to have all the services in the same spot to assist in the issuance of a new passport the same day? But nooooo, that'd be too damn easy and maybe make sense. You'd rather have us running all over the place like chickens with our heads cut off, then find some tosser to confirm that it's really me on the goddamn picture - you know... the one where we're not allowed to smile in in case we look as if we are enjoying the process!
Hey, you know why we can't smile? 'Cause we're totally jacked off!

I served in the armed forces for more than 25 years including over ten years at the Ministry of Defence in London. I have had security clearances which allowed me to sit in the Cabinet Office, five seats away from the Prime Minister while he was being briefed on the first Gulf War and I have been doing volunteer work for the British Red Cross ever since I left the Services. However, I have to get someone 'important' to verify who I am -- you know, someone like my doctor...
who, before he got his medical degree 6 months ago WAS LIVING IN PAKISTAN.....

Yours sincerely,
An Irate British Citizen

The Beanstalk Broke

2010-01-22T10:28:00.002Z

No, no-one can have that title because I thought of it and I shall use it. And it's true. The beanstalk broke, Jack fell ten feet to the ground and the follow spot turned the pink fairy green. There were other little catastrophes - like me forgetting to introduce the Princess, the dog food in the bakery scene (?) refusing to open and the music for the spectacular Hoe-down skipping leaving the ensemble repeating the same moves over and over again like a surrealist dream.

Ah, well. Maybe we'll get it right by the end of the run. It's particularly appropriate for me, though, because my next but one book, Murder Imperfect, for which I have to write a blurb today (aargh) starts with a panto disaster. There. Now you really all want to read it, don't you?

The Headmistress Effect - a rant against practically everything

2010-01-18T13:53:00.005Z

I am SICK TO DEATH of being told what to do. By the government, the aspiring government, the health Nazis, the social reformers and practically everyone else who thinks, somehow, they have a right to tell everyone else The Way To Do It.

Take, for instance, this supremely daft idea of David Cameron's to give married couples a tax break in order to promote Marriage As A Way Of Life. We are no longer ruled by the Christian Church, it is no longer evil to live with a partner, of either sex, and the presence, lurking at the bottom of a dusty drawer, of a piece of paper stating that X and Y stood up in front of a person in a long white frock or a smart navy suit who did nothing more than say a few words at them, is not going to stop the breakdown of a relationship.

And today - exemptions from debt for students who get first class degrees??? I am so incensed I can barely type the words.

So far in the naughties and now the - what? teens? - we are no longer allowed to smoke anywhere but our own homes (and watch it! They'll try and stop that next) and the Milk Marketing Board, or whatever it likes to call itself these days, is telling us we are now ready to change from semi-skimmed to skimmed milk. Have they told the cows?

The attitude has slithered down to otherwise intelligent individuals, too. There have always been people who have no fear of telling you exactly what their opinion is on any given subject, and, again, telling you what to do. But now these people, and a good many more, show total disapproval if you deviate from their notion of How It Should Be Done.

I am fed up with it. (Had you guessed?) I really didn't think I would grow up to live in an Autocracy, but it appears to be the way we are going. Big Brother reigns, OK. And not on telly, either. Isn't there anybody out there in some sort of position of power who will tell the afore-mentioned organisations that they are being bl**dy daft? It's 2010 and most of us are grown up. As long as I don't kick the cats, and I'm nice to my children, I'll do what I like, thank you very much.

Happy New Year!

2010-01-03T12:10:00.002Z

Happy New Year to everyone and anyone who reads or happens on my blog.

In December, I received copies of three of my re-jacketed books, which makes me feel like a real writer, with different editions. I am deep into final rehearsals for two weeks of panto coming up, from which I shall post pictures when I get them. Philly has recovered from her operation on December 7th, and will now undergo intensive vocal therapy to get the singing voice (tested to the limit at our Christmas party!) up to scratch.

Half an inch of snow which fell an hour ago is now melting, and lunch is cooking. Son Leo's girlfriend, however, who was meant to be eating it with us in a couple of hours, is unable to get through due to being reliant on buses and living in a village. Unfortunately, Leo doesn't drive, so he's no help! Ah, the problems of young love!

Leo is temporarily living with me again, so burglars take note. I am Not Alone. (Still haven't quite recovered from last Valentine Day's burglary.)

Thank you to all my readers in 2009, and I hope you will continue to buy/borrow in 2010.

Love from Libby and Me.

New Look Books

2009-12-01T08:55:00.005Z

Here's the cover for Murder in the Green, followed by all the news ones!

Covers and concert

2009-11-28T10:56:00.003Z

What a proud Mummy! Last night I went to see Phillipa in the end of term concert at the Royal Academy of Music. A stunning ensemble of thirty young people all selected for their outstanding talent, who are now one third of the way through their course. You wonder how much more they can learn. The orchestra, of course, also Royal Academy students, were fabulous, as you would expect, the MD and chorus master, Stephen Hill, a marvel.

Each member of the course had a solo, Philly's small, as they are saving her voice until after she's had her throat operation a week on Monday. There were many moments through the evening which made the hairs on the back of my neck stand up, and the only thing I could have wished for was that Philly's elder sister Lou (also a singer, in case you don't know) could have been there. Her best friend, best friend's brother, sister-in-law-elect and two sponsors were there with me, and we all agreed it was a fab evening.

Other stunning news - I am being rejacketed. A whole new matching set will be out next year, and apparently one of the wholesalers (Bertrams) is to do a special promotion of them all when book 6 comes out in April. Oh - and book 7 will also be out next year on October 25th, in time for Christmas. Long live Libby Sarjeant.

Last week I attended the RNA winter party, had lunch and shopping before with Bernardine Kennedy and a lightening catch up with other friends when we got there. The result - dreadful feet for two days. One day in London equals ratcheted up arthritis for days afterwards. As I was up there yesterday, guess how I feel today?

Ain't yer got no sense of yoomer?

2009-10-30T07:43:00.003Z

Having actually watched poor Ian Rankin (teehee!) on the Crime Thriller Awards last night, I have to admit that his comment was, indeed, a throwaway joke. I'm not apologising for being defensive on behalf of the Romantic Novelists' Association, or writers of the ubiquitous Women's Fiction, merely saying yes, it was a joke, and I'm sure he would be astonished at the reaction it has provoked in our community.

I can, unfortunately, see how our combined raised spines would appear to the general public. Do I need to spell it out? I think the title of this post says it all. So come on, ladies and gents, think of a good joke for the crime writers. (Oh, that includes me, doesn't it? Bother.)

After a comforting discussion with my publisher the other day, I'm pleased to report that I have a stay of execution on the current book - pub. date now moved to April - another book is required after that, and large print and audio versions of Murder in Bloom are out on Monday. All the Libby Sarjeant series is now in audio, but this will be my first large print. Thrilled to bits. I will be able to eat for at least another year...

Blood on the carpet says Mr Rankin

2009-10-28T15:30:00.005Z

Apparently this is what happens whenever two or more romantic novelists gather together. Harpies and harridans, the lot of us.

Now, I'm a member of the Romantic Novelists' Association and the Crime Writers' Association. Over my years of membership, I have met more close friends through the RNA than the CWA could shake a stick at. They are supportive, helpful, genuinely pleased at each other's successes and have a unique New Writers' Scheme. I have been a member of the CWA for three years. (Sorry - was there more to that sentence? No? Ah.)

So please, crime writers, leave it out. It isn't funny - it may have been when first uttered fifteen years ago - and it most certainly isn't true.

A gentle trot through October

2009-10-21T10:06:00.004Z

I did try to blog while on holiday in Cavus, Turkey, but for some reason the Turkish server wouldn't let me! I managed everything else; I wrote, Tweeted, Facebooked and emailed, and listened to music and comedy on the ipod and the laptop. Fab. Three weeks is, however, too long. I've spent three weeks there before, but when I was still fairly new to the place (ie, only been there three or four times). Now, however, three weeks away from home, the cats and the children is too long. My friend Marie suggested I shouldn't have kept up with home so much, but she can talk! She, grandmother of the year, who has to phone home to find out how grandson 1 has done at football, not to mention phoning to wish him luck before every match...

Cats were spoilt by their Auntie Alison, who lived in for the whole time. Despite the fact that they now think they can have at least two breakfasts and can sleep on my bed with me (shades of Alan Davis's cats who went to live with his sister), I am so grateful to Alison, who (the mug) has said she'll do it anytime.

I am on the home straight with Murder in Bloom, and it has been even more of a struggle. I suppose each one will get harder and harder. Four of the books are now in audio, and I'm still hoping Magna or Thorpe will pick them up for large print. I have a beautiful new map of Steeple Martin drawn by my friend Susan Alison which is on my website and will appear in each new book.

Jack and the Beanstalk will be the pantomime at the Whitstable Playhouse in January 2010, and I'm extremely pleased to say I shall be playing the Queen. It's years since I was actually IN a panto, having been conned - I mean, asked - to direct more recently. Luckily directed ones wot I had writ, so got the royalties, but it's not the same as being in one.

Daughter Phillipa is having the time of her life at the Royal Academy of Music, and I would like to add my own thanks to all those who helped her get there.

That's about it for now. Do let me know if you've read this by commenting.

Looking for a fan!

2009-08-24T12:55:00.002Z

I received a lovely email via my website this morning, and have tried to reply three times, only to have the horrible FAILURE message come whizzing back on elastic. Part of the address was sue@pepper, and she says she read the blog, so if she does - please get in touch again!

Otherwise, not much to report. Still struggling with book 6, but spent a whole afternoon doing hard copy editing yesterday and feel a little happier with it. One Twitter-friend says she's aiming to do 6000 words a day this week for a deadline. Deadline? I'd be dead! I aim for 2000 a day, but the amount of thinking I do uses up so much time that I flag at about the 1500 mark. I wish I could think it all through first and then just type the words, like copytyping. Doesn't work like that, though, does it?

Philly moves up to London at the weekend (between gigs) and starts at The Royal Academy on Tuesday. Gor blimey. I would like to thank all my friends who have so generously helped her. I am truly gob-smacked. You all deserve - well, I don't know what you deserve. Sainthood, possibly.

Now to plod on with book 6. See you soon -ish.

Bad Babes, Music Hall, Lou's and Leo's birthdays

2009-08-13T10:39:00.003Z

Lots of catching up to do.

On Sunday 19th July Catherine Aird and I had our very badly attended book signing in Oxfam in Canterbury. I think (God Bless Simon Hall for thinking of it) it was a mistake. Oxfam bookshops are pushing indie bookshops out of the market place, when they're already under threat from the big chains. Also, of course, second hand book sales are NOT good for authors. If customers only buy second hand books, we don't get any money! And please don't compare us to washing machines or clothes, which are also sold second hand. A book is due solely to the industry of its author, and our ancillary editors, publishers and printers, of course!

Number one child Lou's birthday was fun, held in her garden which she and Jarrod had decked out very prettily. Both children slept through it. Music Hall - very hard on the feet - was sold out every night and received high praise from everyone, including Those In The Know from the British Music Hall Society, but from one couple, whom I thought of as friends, total disparagement. However, as their daughter is on the West End stage, perhaps their critical faculties are set rather high!

Talking of West End Stage, those who follow us will know that Phillipa, number three child, has obtained a place at The Royal Academy of Music starting in September. Her course has been informed that they are to form the choir at Elton John's Albert Hall concert with Teddy Thompson, introduced by Stephen Fry on September 22nd. Oh, WOW!!! Of course the tickets have been sold out long before they were told they were doing it, so fond parents will not be admitted.

Number four child, Leo, came home from Manchester for a week, during which he celebrated his 25th birthday (notice I didn't say which one Louise celebrated) with a party on the day and a trip to The Globe with the aged p to see As You Like It. We were both enchanted. If the arthritis could stand the underground I'd go every week.

Number two child Miles has organised, bless him, for a downstairs loo to be put into my house - if I can get my office cleared out in time for the visiting New Zealand plumber. Otherwise, Miles just goes on being a good son who lives over the road and is performing locally tonight. I shall be there cheering.

Last night, Linda Regan, Kaye C Hill, Mary Andrea Clarke and I held the first "Bad Babes" event at Waterstones, Bromley. We, or rather Linda, had devised a crime quiz, which she and I ran. I didn't know the answers, sadly. The winners received tickets for performances of "The Spider's Web" by Agatha Christie at The Churchill Theatre in November. We then talked about our writing, helped greatly by Linda's husband, Brian Murphy, who kept us going with very intelligent questions. I want to have Brian when Linda's finished with him. A successful evening, organised by the lovely lady whose last event it was, as she is moving from bookselling to librarianship. Everyone even got more than one glass of wine!

That's it for now. All comments gratefully received - let me know there are people out there reading it!

Bad Babes, Oxfam and Twitter

2009-07-11T08:13:00.004Z

I am at home and wishing I was at the RNA conference in Penrith. However, have a christening to go to tomorrow afternoon and my eldest daughter's birthday party tomorrow night, so all is not lost.

Next Sunday, as part of the Oxfam Bookfest, another Kent crime writer, Catherine Aird, and I will be signing our books at the Oxfam bookshop in St Peter's Street, Canterbury, an iniative by CWA member Simon Hall, of whom there is a picture somewhere way back in this blog. To publicise this event I shall be on Red Sands Radio on - well, possibly, Thursday, or Friday - or even Saturday! I shall also be publicising the Music Hall at The Playhouse the following week, Whitstable Oyster Week, in which I am appearing. Not, as in times past, taking a hugely active role, because I'm lazy.

Also, news on the Bad Babes front. Our inaugural event, a quiz, glass of wine and panel is to take place at Waterstones, Bromley, at 6.15 pm on August 12th. We have two other crime writers with us, so cover all shades of crime writing.

I have also linked Twitter feed to this blog in case anyone who reads it(is there anyone?) would like to follow me, or would like me to follow them. I know there are those who don't "get" Twitter, but I've actually made some new friends there, believe it or not. You usually end up with like minded people - in my case, mainly authors!

Hey ho, it's off to work we go. Bye for now.

Murder in the Green

2009-06-29T11:10:00.002Z

Catching up to say that Murder in the Green has to be delivered by mid September when I go to Turkey for the annual jolly. It's going like treacle despite all that research I did previously, but hey-ho. Sure I'll make it.

Since last post I've been to Majorca to my oldest friend's villa. Unfortunately, I can't walk that far these days and there was no shade in her garden, so not unalloyed joy. Very nice, though, although home-in-the-sun owning seems to be a lot of hard work.

Other work related news: fellow crime writer Linda Regan and I are now calling ourselves Bad Babes. Not my idea, obviously! Went to her recent book launch in London and everyone there loved the name, including Simon Brett, whom I thought would have Known Better! Anyway, we have our inaugural outing in August at a branch of Waterstones, hopefully. I also have a signing/event at the Oxfam bookshop in Canterbury on July 19th with another crime writer, Catherine Aird, as part of the Oxfam BookFest.

Sadly, new agent Kate Nash and I have parted company. Kate has more than enough on her plate this year without having me to worry about, and as I already have a happy relationship with my publisher, Accent Press, there isn't too much she could do for me. When I finally get writing the stand alone, or a new series, that'll be time to try for an agent.

Off I go then - another 2000 words to write today.

Sixth Libby on its way!

2009-05-08T13:26:00.002Z

Thank you, Leigh! I'm sure you must have done the trick.

Yes, Hazel Cushion, MD of Accent Press, rang me yesterday to say they would like a 6th Libby Sarjeant novel. That's good, because I'd already done most of the research. So, next March 8th, Murder in The Green will make its appearance. I have actually started writing it, so with a bit of luck I won't end up in a mad panic at the end.

I shall try and continue with the stand-alone along side MITG. I know writers who can do this, the indefatigable Penny Jordan, for instance, who not only writes her three M&Bs a year, but one for Avon and another for HC under the name of Annie Groves. Don't know how she does it. I think I'm much lazier.

Now looking forward to the RNA Summer party next Wednesday, and my own little launch party on May 18th. Such larks.

Girls, shed and new Libby

2009-05-06T09:56:00.002Z

Spontaneous snap of us in the garden taken by son-in-law on his Blackberry. Show off. Ghastly of me, as usual, but the girls look pretty. My shed/summerhouse is behind us where I sleep - sorry, work - occasionally in the afternoons, and where yesterday I began research for a new Libby book, suggested by Lou on Monday while we watched May Day celebrations (a lot of people stamping and waving sticks and hankies) in Whitstable. Will now offer it with great trepidation to Accent Press and hope they want me to go ahead. Please all email them and say how much you want a 6th in the series! Not if you hate them, of course.

Oh, and congratulations to Christina's TBT on passing his CBC. Hooray!

May day, may day!

2009-05-03T08:44:00.005Z

It's the May bank holiday weekend and I've been out in the evening two days running. First to an excellent gig, Kit Curtis and The Scene, a band comprised of family and friends (how unusual - I'm called the band mafia mother in this part of the world) and second to a Mama Mia evening at the theatre. Not in the auditorium, but just for rowdy members in the bar, where we all sang and giggled and made fools of ourselves. Great fun.

Now I'm on Twitter I procrastinate even more, as I said before, but at least it's helping me post pictures:

Aaah!

Book comes out in two weeks. Might have a little party to celebrate.

New Website and Murdering Mistresses

2009-04-15T12:12:00.002Z

My new website is now operational at the same address as before, so please take a look and let me know what you think.

Linda Regan and I have settled on her name for us, which is Murdering Mistresses! We will be offering joint talks and workshops in much the same way as Sarah Rayne and Maureen Carter do as Lethal Ladies, although we haven't quite worked out the details yet! She has a much fuller calendar than I do, as she's still a working actress, but we'll manage something eventually.

I've managed to waste even more time now I'm on Twitter, but did find out about a new review of one of my books on a US website through Twittering, so not all bad.

Please leave a comment if you've read this post so I know I'm not spouting into a void. Liz and Jan, bless you for yours.

Criminal Tendencies and Linda Regan

2009-04-07T09:51:00.003Z

As previously posted, Criminal Tendencies is out this month, and fellow contributor Linda Regan and I are going to pal up to do some publicity for it. http://www.lindareganonline.co.uk/ There are also plans for us to do a little more than that, too. Watch this space.

I am also having my website professionally redesigned for the first time since my late husband designed the very first one for my pantomimes. I'm very pleased with it so far, and will post a new link as soon as it's finished.

The other thing I've done is joined Twitter. I could procrastinate for England all on my own, I thought, until I discovered all my friends doing the same thing.

Criminal Tendencies and Support your Local High Street - not!

2009-04-02T11:02:00.004Z

Criminal Tendencies has landed on my desk and will escape into the wider world any minute now. I'm proud to be part of it, and fellow mystery author Linda Regan (married to actor Brian Murphy and once a Yellowcoat in Hi!-de-Hi) and I are going on a joint publicity hunt. Look out Radio Kent.

This morning, I decided to try out my local library, which I do periodically, retiring disappointed every time. This time it was even worse. They are "upgrading services" so can't even look up a book or an author. Have they binned all the old paper systems? Where are all the old cards? Babies and bathwater springs to mind. Neither did they have ANY of the authors I was looking for, all members of either the Romantic Novelists' Association or the Crime Writers' Association. What????????

My new Co-op membership number didn't work, I couldn't buy several items I'd gone out for - in fact, the only success was taking bottles to the bottle bank. I managed that all right.

Murder in Bloom is still waiting for final edits, but I'm assured it's still on track.
So I'm currently working on the research for the stand-alone. Heigh ho.

Hurrah!

2009-03-23T08:55:00.002Z

Having worried like mad about Murder in Bloom, expecting it to flop into the inbox with Rejection! stamped all over it, I've just heard from Kind Editor Bob that he's up to his neck in paperwork, but he doesn't think there's any need for major rewrites. I can now set up the Waterstones signing and anything else we've got lined up without the embarrassment of having to cancel it all because I've been dropped. Could, of course, be dropped afterwards, so I'd better get on with writing the stand-alone in the hope that Clever Agent Kate can sell it...

I've been asked to contribute a piece to Crime Time Online: http://www.crimetime.co.uk to coincide with the escape of Murder in Bloom, and, of course, I'm hoping to do some publicity for Criminal Tendencies, the charity anthology to which I've contributed: http://www.cremedelacrime.com/books.htm. Also, with advice from my friend Jenny and Clever Agent Kate, I'm going to attempt to beef up my online presence - viral marketing they call it...

As I'm writing this on the new laptop I don't have a cover picture to upload, but as soon as I'm sent a replacement I'll pop it on. Watch this space. (If you can be bothered.)

Blooming Murder

2009-03-10T10:28:00.003Z

The book, Murder in Bloom, is about to wing its way to the publishers at last. It's been a struggle, but who said being a novelist was easy?

Much excersised by media controversy surrounding the exploitation of one's own children. I am now very wary of reporting anything to do with my hugely talented, beautiful and extraordinary children! (Do hope they read this.) I have recently reported the birth of my grandaughter, Kitty; perhaps I shouldn't have? However, that was included in the newspaper report of my burglary (don't ask - will post a picture of the placard), so is in the public domain. What I haven't reported is that one of those hugely talented etc etc, Phillipa, has gained a place at the Royal Academy of Music, one of the most prestigious conservatoires in the world. This is a huge step towards her dream, which has been held since she was 12. She has achieved her degree in Music, she teaches it and performs, but this would be the pinnacle. So now we're going all out for sponsorship. Anybody got any ideas?

Youngest of above mentioned etc etc, Leo arrives for a week's visit today. Aah, my baby's coming home...

News and Blues

2009-03-07T10:44:00.004Z

After alarums and excursions of February, I am delighted to announce the arrival of Kitty Coombes to Louise and Jarrod, born on March 1st at 7.50 pm (sensible time), a sister for Gus. She weighed in at 7lbs 7oz after her mother arrived at hospital for her water birth half an hour before! And born in the caul, if anyone knows what that means!

My birthday on March 3rd, and Miles and Phillipa took me to dinner at our local Thai restaurant. I have found another car - a Seat Arosa - although I'm having to top up the insurance settlement, naturally. Gone are the days when I could buy a new car.

My poor book has suffered during this period. I haven't reported the subsequent theft of Phillipa's car by the villains who took mine and her spare key. Hers was discovered a few days later in Milton Keynes with £1000 damage, mine has not been recovered and the incident now connected to a much more serious crime, about which we know nothing, but have to be kept in the loop, apparently.

I have new 5 bar mortice locks front and back and a quote for an alarm system which I can't afford. I am very p*ssed off at the cost of this burglary; even with insurance one ends up doling out money every which way. Not to mention the paranoia which means I'm still wary about coming out of my room in the morning and worried about what I will find when I come home if I've been out.

Book will be finished this weekend, then I will have to start on the next one. I'm very grateful that I still have gainful employment...

n

2009-03-07T10:44:00.001Z

Burglars, babies and birthdays

2009-02-16T11:34:00.002Z

Is this a record? Updating my blog so quickly? Well, yes, probably, but I'm no longer a happy bunny.

On Saturday morning I woke up to find I'd been burgled during the night. Still makes my stomach turn over when I think about it. The b*ggers were creeping around downstairs while I was asleep. They found my car keys and took my car, the TV, my mobile, money and my G4 ibook (laptop).

Son Miles has now nailed up the utility room door where they got in, his partner Clare cleaned and tidied the whole of the downstairs of my house - including, to my shame, the office - and Philly came home to take me shopping and provide in-house support. Lou was on the phone every five minutes, but bless her, her imminent baby has been taking its toll and she has been very poorly. Goodness, I even had to go down by train to put my grandson to bed on Friday! Quelle sacrifice...

Leo (in Manchester) read me the riot act about security, and wished all sorts of blights on the perpetrators.

To happier things, I attended the 60th birthday party yesterday of my friend Judith, held in her friend Sue's spectacular ancient farmhouse in a gorgeous part of Kent. Wonderful food, great frinds and plenty of champagne. I had a great time, but coming back to reality was a bit of bump.

Will now wait for the insurers and try and focus on The Book. Will it get finished, I ask myself? Of course I reply - even if it's a day or so late!

Talks and thoughts

2009-02-13T12:09:00.002Z

Last Tuesday, 10th February, I was invited to give a talk on how I became a novelist and how to write a novel. Not that I know, of course! The hotel was the Hythe Imperial, where I had hosted the CWA conference last year, and the ladies, none of whom were writers, were a lovely bunch. We had a great lunch and I sold all the books I had taken with me. Most enjoyable, and a break from sitting at the keyboard dredging up scintillating prose.

Last night, there was a programme on publishing on BBC2. How extremely depressing. Most of us novelists knew it all, of course, but to see it on The Money Programme really brought it home. So far, in the last few years, the government has gradually eroded the very cornerstones of my life. The independent bookshop has almost disappeared. The pub is following close behind, thanks to the smoking ban and the cheap alcohol in supermarkets. Oh - hang on! The bookshop's disappeared because of - yesss! The cheap books in the supermarkets.

The supermarkets, of course, keep a close eye on what, in the way of reading matter, they allow us to buy. So unless your publisher has the wherewithal to pay huge marketing fees to get your book onto their shelves, you're pretty well doomed. Therefore, you are relegated to the status of "mid-list" author, and who are the authors who are getting dropped to make room for celebrities who are asked to "write" romance novels? (Naming no names.) The mid-list authors. It honestly makes you wonder why we do it?

Neill Denny of The Bookseller believes the changes in the book world have led to a more democratic list for readers.
"The market is better reflecting the tastes of the entire population rather than an educated elite that went to bookshops," he says.
"That educated elite are still going to bookshops and buying books, but loads of other people are buying books now that weren't 10 or 20 years ago.
"I think that's a good thing." (Courtesy of the bbc website.)

Is he right? The problem is that these new readers are only given the choice of the books on sale in supermarkets, not the thousands of books written by people like me and many of my friends, who have to fight to bring our books to the notice of the general public.

I don't know - no smoking, no pub, no bookshop. Stop the world, I want to get off.

Romantic Novelists vote Richard Armitage

2009-02-06T13:48:00.004Z

Sexiest Thing On Two Legs

British actor Richard Armitage has leapt from last year’s 4th place to this
year topping the ratings in the Romantic Novelists’ Association 2009
Valentine’s poll, to take the title of Sexiest Thing on Two Legs, beating
top Hollywood stars to the number one spot.
Johnny Depp, who topped last year’s poll, was pushed firmly into second
place, with Hugh Jackman and George Clooney mere also-rans. “Richard
Armitage took 20% of the vote, more than double the count of any other male on the list,” said the RNA pollster. “He was a clear winner from the off.”
The RNA is not alone in admiration of the actor, as numerous online Richard Armitage fan sites will testify. The ardency began with North and South, grew by leaps and bounds with the leather-clad baddie in Robin Hood, and shows no sign of diminishing as Spooks takes to the airwaves.
‘It’s a coup for Britain,’ said one starstruck writer, ‘not just for sexy
Richard.’

According to romantic novelists, the sexiest male celebrities of 2009 are:

1 Richard Armitage

2 Johnny Depp

3 Hugh Jackman

4 George Clooney

5 Daniel Craig

6 Sean Bean

7 Alan Rickman

8 David Tennant

9 Pierce Brosnan

10 Gerard Butler
(Courtesy of the RNA Press Officer)

I can only say, I agree!

Shirley Valentine

2009-02-05T00:14:00.003Z

On Wednesday evening I watched a BBC television programme called Movie Connections. Only just watched, as it happened. Because on Wednesday morning, my friend Roy Brown, who, when he isn't being an actor and a singer, is a builder, came to mend my roof and my guttering. I have Sky TV, with - natch - Sky Plus, and unbeknownst to Roy, during his stirling efforts, something must have happened to my Sky dish. So, when I turned on the television for the news, nothing happened. The upshot was that the nice Sky man on the end of the phone, after taking me through the requisite checks, confirmed that I needed an engineer. Meanwhile, how do I survive without the, admittedly small, amount of TV I normally watch?
DS1 (writers' parlance for Dear Son One, namely, Miles) to the rescue. He plugged various cables into different sockets, re-programmed the television, and Lo! I could receive terrestrial TV.
And there it was. Movie Connections on Shirley Valentine. How peeved I was that I hadn't been able to Sky Plus it for perpetuity. For twice, over ten years ago now, I played Shirley. As someone on the programme said, it was the defining moment and the greatest role any actress could ever have. Forget Lady Macbeth, this is the one. More people came up to talk to me in Tesco than ever before. "That was me, you know," they all said. And it was. There is a greater truth in Shirley's story than there ever was in that sad woman forever washing her hands.
I shall be forever grateful to my friend Judith, who cast me in the role and whose birthday party I shall attend next week, for giving me the greatest chance ever. And for anyone who has never seen it - at least rent the DVD!

Happy New Year

2009-01-21T14:36:00.003Z

Oh, dear, I've done it again. Only because I've suddenly discovered my friend Christina Jones has a blog have I realised it's almost a month and a half since I updated my own - if, of course, anyone reads it.

Christina's books, if you don't know, are the absolute best sort of romantic comedy, which she calls Bucolic Frolics, which is also the name of her blog. Why she isn't celebrated as much as Katie Fforde and Jill Mansell (my two other favourites and also mates) I shall never know.

I am now over half way through the mss of Murder in Bloom, which means I have to complete the other half in just over five weeks. I make all sorts of calculations, i.e. if I write two thousand words a day, seven days a week, I could do it in three weeks. On the other hand, if I do two thousand words FIVE days a week I could do it in three weeks. Huh? Like a lot of us writers, maths was never my strong point.

There are other things to take into consideration; for instance: yesterday I went to London to have lunch with my new agent. Yes, at last I have an agent, and no, I'm not going to say who it is. It is however, very encouraging that someone other than my publisher thinks I am A Proper Writer, and she is going through my contracts with an eagle eye and showing me just what I've been missing. I'm also trying to get the publishers to change the cover for Murdeer in Bloom, which is about the garden of a semi-stately home being landscaped. Have a look at the current cover on amazon and let me know what sort of book it suggests to you!

Anyway, that was a day away from writing, because, unlike a lot of my workaholic friends I really can't work in the evening. That time is for open fires, cats and other people's books, with a smattering of television. (Rented a Bill Bailey dvd for tonight. Can't wait.) Another day away is on February 10th, when I'm giving an after-lunch speech at The Hythe Imperial hotel. And occasionally, the family require a little attention, although while I'm slaving at my deadline they're being very good and leaving me alone.

And now I'd better got on...after all, I have to finish work at five. (Self imposed office hours.) Do leave a comment if you chance on this blog. It all helps to spread the word. Happy New Year!

Sing Out!

2008-12-02T13:45:00.003Z

Just finished appearing in Sing Out! at the Whitstable Playhouse. An enjoyable experience with no pressure, except that I got so nervous about my solo, a vaguely comic song called It's Harry I'm Planning to Marry, I actually felt ill on stage on Saturday. Perhaps it's time to hang up my microphone.

I received my copy of the audio version of Murder at The Laurels this morning and I LOVE the cover. They do their own, rather than reproduce the book covers, and it really looks as though they've taken note of the story. So many of my friends, particularly in the category romance field, have covers which bear no relation to the story or characters whatsoever. My friend Elizabeth Chadwick, a highly respected author writing in the medieval period, used to have terrible trouble with covers which looked more like Disney representations of Sleeping Beauty.

Murder in Bloom is struggling on and with any luck I'll deliver it to the publishers by the end of February for publication in May. On Thursday this week (December 4th) I'm on Radio Kent at 3pm talking about pantomime to Pat Marsh, and next week I shall be talking about the same thing to a local WI group. The following week I shall be talking to Radio WFM in Manchester again, as I did last year, also about pantomime! 9.30 am on 15th if anyone in Manchester reads this.

Family all well, Philly home from the Carribean tomorrow and straight up to London to play at an awards evening, so I'm driving up to take evening dresses and music and stuff and bring home her holiday case, as she won't be back in Kent for days.

If I don't post again before Christmas (as if I would) Merry Christmas to all our readers!

Holidays and families

2008-10-23T09:53:00.006Z

Late as usual. Murder by the Sea has been out for nearly three months and is apparently doing all right. Holiday in Cavus as relaxed as ever, met all the old lags and generally did nothing. Had a book signing as several of them had taken copies with them, and have some great pictures of people (Sue, Marie and Alison) reading by the pool!

Book, however, not doing nearly so well as my friend Julia Williams - whose Strictly Love hit the zeitgeist bang on the button, and is a fantastic read. Comes with a free "How to Dance" book, too!

Also had a lovely weekend with my cousins in Burnham-on-Crouch. Lovely place. Unfortunately my poor cousin Penny is now going to have to put up with me more than she wants as I liked it so much I'm transporting it to Kent to use it in the next novel. Yes, folks, despite public opinion, there will be a new Libby Sarjeant book out next June. Let's hope the credit crunch doesn't affect the book trade.

Eldest daughter is happily half way through her second pregnancy, and I'm still fighting against my "Nanny" title. I shall have to coach my grandson when he's a little older, then he can choose a name for me - which could be dodgy. Eldest son still gigging and he and his partner Clare looked after cats for me while I was away. Needless to say, one of them ran away (just like school guinea pigs dying during the holidays) but came home again with an abscess. All sorted now.

Younger daughter currently on tour with a prog-rock (?) band called Karnataka, playing London Astoria2 tonight and having to dash back to Cambridge to teach. Younger son still living in frequently flooded "garden" flat in Manchester, working hard and not playing as much as he'd like.

That's up to date. I'll try and remember to update a little more frequently, but I'm so lazy!

A Crime Novelist's Progress

2008-09-08T10:21:00.003Z

On Saturday, I did a signing at Waterstone's, Westwood Cross, Kent. I didn't sell that many books, but met some very nice people, some of whom had read all the books, one of whom bought the latest and then an hour later came back and bought the rest. The manager showed me my sales over the months on their computer - a bit of a blur as I hadn't got my glasses on - and both he, Neil, and his assistant, Claire, were absolutely charming.

Since Murder by the Sea came out, I have been on the cover of a Saturday Review magazine (only in Kent, unfortunately!) and been interviewed (again) by our local papers, and, impressively, by a Kent glossy for their October edition. I have also featured recently in a magazine called This England in a piece about Kent based crime writers. I have also been asked to contribute to a charity anthology alongside such luminaries of my genre as Simon Brett and Reginald Hill and been asked to write a feature for the local paper.

Fears for the future were unfounded as the fifth Libby Sarjeant book has been commissioned for release next June and I have already started on that. This year I have also served on a panel at CrimeFest with other luminaries Andrew Taylor, Lesley Horton and Stephen Booth and, as previously anguished about, organised the Crime Writers' Association Conference.

OK - now. My problem is this. Can I now call myself a novelist? Can I now call myself a CRIME novelist? I can tell you (if anybody's reading this) I certainly don't feel like one. I feel as though I'm playing at it, and someone will pop their head round the door sooner or later and say: "Come on, now, Lesley, time to stop playing those silly games."

Oh, well. I suppose I just go on playing...

Murder by the Sea - out at last!

2008-08-24T10:45:00.002Z

After various vicissitudes, the 4th in the Libby Sarjeant series is now out. I have had the report from my top fan, who always tells me the truth, and despite my misgivings, she really enjoyed it.

I have been researching material for a stand-alone novel, although no-one's asked me for one, but I'm ever hopeful. Hoping that the 5th Libby book will also pass muster, but daren't ask Accent as they are so busy setting up the New York office, which will be releasing the first three Libby books as US editions next year.

I'll try to write more often - promise!

New Style Blog (thanks to Jan Jones)

2008-05-03T13:12:00.003Z

Sorry about having to wade through the cover pictures before getting to the nitty gritty, but I don't seem to be able to get the book covers small enough to fit neatly along the side like Mandy did before! Digitally challenged, that's me. And I used to write for Which Computer. Makes you weep doesn't it?

CWA conference

2008-05-03T09:29:00.003Z

Well, it's over. And after all my worries, it went superbly well and I had a fantastic time. I've received so many compliments my head will hardly go through the door, but I have to say most of the compliments belong to the hotel, the Hythe Imperial. The service, rooms, presentation and food were simply amazing. My four speakers were praised fulsomely, and I was told afterwards that rarely had they speakers of such uniform excellence. So thank you, Will Randall, Simon Hall, Sebastian Lucas and Tom Harper.

Will and Simon are both writers, and they, together with Simon's lovely wife Jess, Tim Bates, who is our rights agent and my second-in-command for the weekend and Hazel, MD of Accent Press and my and Simon's publisher, spent the weekend with me. With the addition on Saturday of Simon's agent Darrin Jewell, we formed the Naughty Table and much drink was taken.

So now I can concentrate on The Book, which is coming along nicely at last.

Oh - and the glass still hasn't been replaced in the back door...

Gigs, Cats and emails

2008-04-10T08:38:00.004Z

Judy Astley featured large in my last post, and here she is again. Dd1 (writer-speak for Dear Daughter One - ie the eldest girl - whew!) had a gig at the 100 Club last Monday. As Katie Fforde wanted to see Lou perform (research for a book) we were going together to watch. Big treat for Mummy, going to watch little girl on stage.

Lou's partner Jarrod, also a musician, was in Holland for a mini-tour, so his mother was going to babysit our joint grandson - until, that is, she fell over and broke her hip. You've guessed it. I had to babysit. So MY friends went to see MY daughter without me. And to make matters worse, they had a good time! Ah, well.

Catching up on cats: their first mini-outing into the garden, fairly early in the morning, me in dressing gown. After a few minutes, acting on RSPCA advice, I collected mother cat Godiva and put her inside, shutting the door to keep her in. I then retrieved daughter cat from under a bush, sustaining mild injuries along the way (inevitable with cats, I find), and took her to the back door. The handle fell off.

So there was I - out in the garden with a struggling cat and the door locked fast against me. Visions of walking into town in my dressing gown and slippers and going to the police shop - we don't merit a police station, here - played horrifyingly in my head, and Gloria finally struggled to the floor. I abandoned her and did the only thing possible. Smashed the glass. All over the inside cat.

Luckily the back door is the original with small panes, so only one small one has to be replaced, and this of course is the problem - the whole handle/lock mechanism is also the original, circa 1926, which is why we can't get it back together. Ah well.

Glass swept up, with help from the cats - luckily Godiva had escaped the first fine shower - taped card over the hole and had restorative cup of tea.

The following day, as I went to the bathroom for the morning ablutions, accompanied up the stairs, as usual, by the cats, Gloria did her normal thing of walking unsteadily along the curved bannister rail. And fell off. All the way down the stairs.

She's fine, of course. I am slowly recovering equilibrium. Conference is almost sorted, book is still not going well, and the erstwhile Swain from Switzerland and I are still e-corresponding, and have even had one or two telephone conversations. I do hope his partner doesn't mind...

Laying the Ghost

2008-03-17T17:20:00.005Z

Now, this is the title of the latest book by my friend Judy Astley, and very good it is too. It is also a very good title for this post, because the book deals with finding - or being found by - people from your past. Which is what has just happened to me, and I'm stunned!

Once upon a time, when I attended Clapham County Grammar School for Girls, a group of us occasionally interacted (!) with a group of boys. Over the years, I lost touch with most of them, girls included, but Brendan stayed a constant. Tall, dark and handsome, he was around to take me for drives, to parties, even to the theatre on one memorable occasion. We last spoke on the phone six months after I'd got together with the late dh, and that was that.

So imagine my surprise, dear reader, when an email turned up in my inbox yesterday morning. He had just joined Friends Reunited, and I'd forgotten I had a brief profile on there. Terribly excited, I paid me money and replied.

This morning I had a long, long email from him remembering all the incidents from our joint past that I also remembered, including some I'd forgotten. As he hasn't got broadband in his flat (in Switzerland) I shall have to wait for him to visit the next internet cafe for the next instalment, but we did spend a lot of this morning when I should have been working emailing back and forth.

Exciting, but is it a dangerous occupation? In her book, Judy comes to the conclusion that it can be, and of course, we all remember the problems Friends Reunited had when it was in its infancy. It's very tempting, especially when drearily over the hill as I am, to fantasise a little, isn't it? And I am...

Bother Judy. I can't use it for a book, now...

Lunches, departing children, Hamlet and the CWA

2008-02-29T11:11:00.004Z

A little better - only two weeks since the last entry.

In which time, I have been to the Lady Mayoress of Canterbury's Ladies of the District lunch - invitation only, of course! - where the guest of honour was Lady Mountbatten. Very interesting, good food and service in Abode, the former Chaucer Hotel. The following day, to London with daughter Louise, to lunch with Katie Fforde, who wanted to interview Lou about her job, as she has a character in her next book who does the same. We are going to the next of Lou's public gigs in London together for Katie too see how it all works in practice.

This week, daughter Philly has finally moved out, to go and live in Cambridge with fellow band members, and take up a temporary job with the Faculty of Engineering. Hollow laughter. I feel rudderless. All four have now gone, and although I was on my own for a couple of years before, it never felt permanent. This time it does.

Yesterday went to see Nothern Ballet's production of Hamlet which was superb. Very controversial and explicit, sexual and torture scenes depicted with graphic realism. Made me cry at the end, though. Difficult thing for a ballet to do...

Still battling on with the CWA conference. Nearly there as far as bookings go, but now have the ghastly finicky bits to do, as well as paying for my own place. Can't afford it, either, but there you go. Where's my second-in-command? Not heard of in ages.

Murder by the Sea has taken a new turn and I feel somewhat happier with it. It won't bear much relation to the original idea, but you can't have everything...

Valentine's Day

2008-02-14T13:18:00.003Z

Must try and be more active on this blog, as it was my publisher who wanted me to start it and I don't think it gets read much... Anyway, it's Valentine's Day, and after the postman had knocked to ask me to sign for a parcel for the daughter, and we had commiserated on our lack of Valentine's Cards - although, as he said, he had an awful lot of red envelopes in his sack this morning - I sat down at the computer ready to work (ha!) and promptly rejoined three online dating agencies. This is truly the triumph of hope over experience, though to my horror I realised that on one, which I had joined some three years ago, my email address hadn't changed, and there were several messages from men with good taste to which I'd never replied, because I hadn't known about them.

I do have a friend coming round this evening to drink a lot of red wine with me and watch a couple of old films. I will, meanwhile, be recording Ashes to Ashes and the wonderful Philip Glenister, who is in my own personal top ten.

Now, I really ought to do some work...

Heroes

2008-02-13T10:59:00.002Z

In time for Valentine's Day, the RNA - Romantic Novelists' Association - have published a list of heroes. This will probably appear on everybody's blog - everybody who reads mine, anyway!

My new cats seem to have been here for ever. They are entertaining and affectionate and so far, not too destructive.

So, here's that list. Please note, it isn't necessarily my choice!

Johnny Depp and Pierce Brosnan make Romantic Novelists’ hearts throb

Members of the Romantic Novelists’ Association have voted Johnny Depp
as the
Number One Perfect Romantic Hero in a poll to mark Valentine’s Day.
According to these authors, a romantic hero should be gorgeous,
deliciously
sexy, intensely masculine and have a commanding presence.

‘We should be qualified to judge,’ one writer commented. ‘After
all, we
create these heroes on paper every day.’

The top ten male celebrities voted the Perfect Romantic Hero were:

1. Johnny Depp

2. Daniel Craig

3. Sean Bean

4. Richard Armitage

5. Hugh Jackman

6. Colin Firth

7. Alan Rickman

8. Pierce Brosnan

9. George Clooney

10. David Tennant

A second poll, taken by members of the RNA bravely admitting to being
‘over
a certain age’, voted for male celebrities over fifty who’ve
‘still got it’.
Remarkable for his appearance on both polls, Pierce Brosnan took the
crown
for the over fifties by a huge margin.

The top ten Over-Fifty Perfect Romantic Heroes were:

1. Pierce Brosnan

2. Harrison Ford

3. Ranulph Fiennes

4. Bill Nighy

5. Liam Neeson

6. Sam Neill

7. Sean Connery

8. Peter O’Toole

9. Clint Eastwood

10. Omar Sharif

Books, Pantomime and Cats

2008-02-07T11:58:00.000Z

Yes, yes, I know, I should have updated this months ago. And my new book covers aren't even up!

Since I last posted, Murder in Midwinter was released, the local press made a big deal of it and my local bookshop held a very successful signing for me. How to Write a Pantomime was released, in a rush, the week before Christmas and I was interviewed by several local radio stations around the country by presenters desperate for a Christmas-related item.

After a quietish Christmas with two of the children suffering with various bugs (Miles couldn't eat any dinner and went to sleep in my bed), we resumed rehearsals for Sleeping Beauty, which finally opened on January 21st for its two week run. We played to packed houses,vocal, nay, vociferous, in their appreciation. One of my favourite moments was my Philly, playing Prince Florizel, and her trusty jester, our friend Martin, doing "I'm Gonna Be(500 Miles)". It raised the roof every night. If I'm lucky, someone will have some pictures and I'll post them on here. I believe there will be some on Facebook in The Playhouse Group: http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=40835&page=1&id=518275930

After a brief flirtation with the idea of moving (comes up every year) I decided to get a cat instead... No, of course it wasn't quite like that. If I had decided to move, I would have waited to get the cat, but as it was; well, along came the RSPCA inspector, who inspected me and the house, I was then invited to the rehoming centre to choose my cat. Make that cats. Well, there they were, 18 month old Lady Godiva and 9 month old Gloria, her daughter, purring, mewing climbing onto the scratching post to dab my cheek...what would you have done?

It is now Thursday, they have been with me for 48 hours and have taken over the house.

Philly is still living with me, although house and cat-sitting for friends this week, but hopes to be moving to Cambridge very soon. Miles and Clare are in New Zealand visiting family, having first been to Oz to do the family thing there, and Leo is still enjoying Manchester. He made my year so far by turning up on the last night of the panto as a surprise for Philly and me. I disgraced myself in the middle of a packed bar and shed a few tears. Our lovely (pregnant) Sleeping Beauty, Gemma, already distraught at the thought of the last night, joined me.

So there we are. I'm now managing to get on with Murder by the Sea, due out in August, and trying to get my head round the upcoming CWA conference, of which I am the extremely reluctant organiser. Very tempted not to go myself and let them get on with it. Sigh. Also, despite saying, as I always do, "I'm never doing panto again", I'm now toying with Jack and the Beanstalk, and wondering whether I could get it written in the next few weeks...

St Pancras, my family, Rail Travel, the NHS...

2007-11-14T13:10:00.000Z

OK - I'm smouldering. No, I'm more than smouldering. I'm in meltdown.

They've just spent HOW MANY billion pounds on St Pancras station? Now, I'm a huge fan of John Betjeman, who was instrumental in saving the original building, and I'm delighted that rail travel is being upgraded. But I'm sorry - to whose benefit? We already had a continental rail link from Waterloo via Ashford - both accesible from the wealthy South-East. It now goes from St Pancras via Ebbsfleet - right out on the eastern edge of the South-East. What benefit will that have? And all the businesses and homes built up around Ashford with the government's promise of an assured and wealthy future - what happens to them?

And the boasting about it is unbelievable. Can we not point these stupid people - jobsworths creating work for other jobsworths - in the direction of the Beeching cuts of the 60s? Which are now acknowledged to have had a deleterious effect on the whole nation. There are people all over the country struggling to re-open those old lines, frequently with no hope of success because they have been built over, but trying because of a belief in reducing the amount of road travel, and because many people in rural communities are virtually cut off. And the government is trying to cut them off even further by cutting 2,500 Post Offices across the country.

Oh - I forgot to mention the health service. Now, here in the South-East we've had a nice juicy NHS scandal recently. An unwanted opportunity to view the inside of a hospital was given to me yesterday, as my daughter Louise sadly suffered a miscarriage. Those who know me also know it wasn't quite as simple as that, but then, when would my family ever do anything the simple way? Anyway - to our muttons. I actually had to go and find someone to come and see the three ladies in Lou's ward, who were all waiting to be discharged and had seen no-one since mid-morning. It was now 4pm. And I mean - no-one. Except the boy who brought their lunch, who also told Lou she could eat. Up until then she assumed she was still nil-by-mouth. No-one had told her otherwise.

Now I know how over-stretched the nursing stff are. We, as a family, also have a very close friend who works at this very hospital.(No, it wasn't the one appearing in our little local scandal.) But when a patient has been told "We need to keep an eye on you" and no-one comes near you for over six hours?

In general, I'm a supporter of the NHS. My own doctor is brilliant and gets furious with some of the other support agencies. While I was with him yesterday, he received a call from someone in a branch of Social Services saying, despite his entreaties, they would not even visit an elderly woman already on morphine to take her a knee support, let alone do anything else for her. He put the phone down on them, something I would never have believed if I hadn't seen it, he is so mild mannered, and I bet they haven't heard the last of it!

OK - so please, government, or anybody else, come to that, redevelop our unused rail network to provide transport for our OWN country. Take the admin away from the poor nursing staff and allow them to NURSE, for Chr*st's sake. Relax the bleedin' no-smoking rule! Just give us tiny little places to call our own and we'll happily kipper ourselves away from the rest of you. Keep the village schools open. Take the monopoly away form the supermarkets. Stop acting like Big Brother - sorry folks, the original Big Brother, not the more recent one - which, of course, should be banned. As should all reality TV. And yes, I HAVE watched some, as I was bullied about it back in the summer. "How can you condemn it if you don't watch it?" So I did.

OK - that's my audition for Grumpy Old Women finished. Except of course, I haven't moaned about the printers going bust with my new book still clutched in their maw. Sorted now, but there were a few hysterical moments. Oh, and the mice...

I have to say, my children think I'm unbelievable and tell me I've become an old woman. They laugh at me - you know, the way they do? As if my opinions were fairly unimportant and faintly risible. You just watch those lamposts down Park Lane...

Murder in Midwinter

2007-10-31T09:18:00.000Z

Well, that's the Music Hall over. Sunday was, as suspected, knackering, but a good response from the audience (1000 seater theatre, this) although very scary when you're out there on your own.

Leo has left home, new job a tad repetitive, but as he said, he stuck Tesco and Jessops for long enough, and at least it's in his own field. He loves Didsbury, and I'm sure he'll get into the local music scene eventually. He'll have to, or all that money he spent on his lovely new Ludwig drum kit will be wasted!

Electrics have been done, I've tidied up my bedroom and feel almost back to normal. First panto rehearsal tonight, minus a couple of principals, but at least we'll get started.

Here's the cover of Murder in Midwinter in case anyone's missed Mandy's lovely slide show further down. Really must send out the press releases!

Music Hall, Panto and family

2007-10-25T08:07:00.000Z

Just finished a week of Old Time Music Hall at The Playhouse - absolutely knackering - now looking forward to starting panto rehearsals next week. We do a one nighter at The Marlowe Theatre, Canterbury on Sunday, which means being there virtually all day, so will be worn out by Monday, especially as a skip arrives today and Leo, Philly and I are starting to clear the garage. Then, on Saturday morning, our favourite electrician, Spanner, is coming to take up the sitting room floor and repair the electrics. Deep joy. Was supposed to be going to friend Paula's evening wedding reception that day, but have a feeling I'll be knee deep in muck and bullets.

Big family news: Louise and Jarrod are having another baby! Well, Lou might actually do most of the work. It's due next June, when Gus will be two. I think I might be pressed into grandmotherly duties, so I've cancelled the June visit to Cavus. Sigh.

More big family news: Leo is leaving home! Actually for the second time, but he's been back with me for over two years, so I shall miss him like mad, especially as he's going to MANCHESTER!!! He's got a job there, and will stay with a friend until he gets a flat.

That's it, I think. New book comes out in a few weeks, have a signing lined up for November 24th at our local indie bookshop, Pirie and Cavender. Must do a bit more publicity than I did last time!

Murder in Midwinter, pantomime and conference

2007-10-04T09:43:00.000Z

I know, I know, I'm pretty crap at keeping up with this.

Got back on Tuesday night from Turkey (saw more dolphins) and youngest son Leo arrived back from Oz Wednesday morning. I had a great time in Cavus; while I was there the Hotel On was filmed for Turkish television, and there was a shot with me on my sunbed in the background! Also, my friend's room was filmed, including a good shot of Murder at The Laurels on her bedside table.

Strangely, there was a murder in the village market while we were there, and of course everybody came rushing up with a new title suggestion...

Panicking about proofs for Murder in Midwinter, which is due out in 7 weeks. Not to mention book 4, due out next July, which I really MUST get down to.

But overshadowing all are my panto auditions. No idea what my PA (production assistant) has got organised for them and I can't get him on his phone, so I shall turn up and try to look authorative and as if I know what I'm talking about. Several auditionees have actually put more work into this than I have, so far.

And of course, there is the CWA conference. My second-in-command, the lovely Tim Bates, took all the paperwork from me, so I'm a bit stranded. As he is deep in Frankfurt preparations (you can never get hold of an agent or a publisher at this time of year) I'm at the bottom of the priority list for him, and the CWA are getting twitchy. So am I...

Seaside Holidays under threat! A rant about smoking.

2007-07-26T07:43:00.000Z

No - unlike most rants about smoking, I'm not against it. I love it. I gave up for ten years, started again and never looked back. Now the only place I can smoke is in my own home and car, and how long will I be able to do that? I foresee smoking while driving becoming a punishable offence soon, as the enjoyable pursuit of going to the pub has now been downgraded to going and having a drink in an uncomfortable outside space herded together like sheep awaiting the dip.

And even there - they're complaining! Listening to the radio yesterday I couldn't believe that the anti-smoking brigade are now complaining that we've gone outside! Will they not be satisfied until smoking has been banned altogether? Don't answer that - of course they won't. Ron Liddle, resident smoking campaigner for The Times, says it all. Times online has all related articles, and says it all much better than I can, but one of the nastier side effects of the ban, as pointed out by one of his readers, is the setting of neighbour against neighbour, friend against friend. I have already seen that, and I know that this post will lose me friends, too. By the way, if Ron Liddle was older, or I was younger, I'd want to marry him. Definitely my sort of bloke, and sounds just like Arthur Smith.

The Victorian Society have a campaign running called Holiday at Home, extolling the delights of the British Seaside Holiday, of which I need no reminding. This reduces our - ahem - carbon footprint by abnegating the need to fly. And yes, I do mean abnegating - look it up. However, when we get to our delightful seaside hotel/apartment/cottage/caravan, we won't be able to smoke, even though hotel rooms are supposedly free from the ban. Ha! So those of us who would actually prefer to spend a week in a hotel in, say, Broadstairs or Salcombe or Ventnor, would be forced to spend most of it on the prom or the beach, assuming that the beach hasn't become a no-dogs and no-smokers area for the summer months. So where do we go. Abroad, that's where we go. And even there, in my favourite small hotel in my favourite tiny village in Turkey, my fellow Brits will wave their hands busily in front of their faces and disapprove. Don't care.

I find I am also being careful about smoking in my own house. I had a meeting in my front room the other day. All lovely people, six men, one woman and me. I had the window open all day, lit candles and had a cigarette in the garden before they arrived. Wine had been contributed to the meeting, and I'm sorry, but I did light up twice. No doubt some of those very nice people will have gone home, stripped off, shoved all their clothes in the washing machine and had a shower to get rid of the smell of my two cigarettes. I felt like apologising to them. Neither can I smoke when my grandson comes to visit, which made last Boxing Day somewhat of an ordeal. However, he IS my grandson and the child of my eldest daughter, whom I love dearly, so I abstain.

Yes, I know all the health risks. But it's my choice. Nothing else, it appears, is. I am lectured by everyone who thinks they have the right to dictate to me - and that's most people, believe me. My human rights are being abraded (another one! Good isn't it?) and the government is sneakily turning us into an Orwellian society. Seriously, if it wasn't for my children, I would leave the country. And if anyone reads this , don't bother to comment. I can hear your cheers at the last statement from here.

Kate Walker competition winner

2007-07-20T11:46:00.000Z

The question I set on Kate Walker's blog competition was answered best, in my opinion, by Ruth Harper in the US, so she gets a copy of Murder in Steeple Martin. I'm still hoping one of the US publishers who specialise in Cosy Crime might pick the series up, Berkeley or Avon, maybe.

Attended a production of Outside Edge at the Whistable Playhouse last night and thoroughly enjoyed it. Next week we have the first production meeting for Sleeping Beauty, next season's pantomime, in my house. Set designer, build crew manager, sound engineer, stage manager and production assistant all crowded into my front room. Alcohol may be taken...

Must now get down to revisions for the new edition of my panto book and start writing Murder in the Midden (I kid you not!) due out next July. Meanwhile, I live in daily expectation of HUGE rewrites of Murder in Midwinter to come thudding through the computer.

ATB.

Holiday, play and RNA conference

2007-07-16T10:52:00.000Z

I'm really not very good at this, am I? Since last posting, I've been in a play, been on holiday to Turkey and attended the RNA conference in Leicester.

Starting with the play, Murder, Music and Mayhem, known as the 3Ms, we played to packed houses and made a lot of money at the box office. I was Lady Evadne Thrusting, well known middle-aged drunk. Type casting, some said. I then went off to my favourite place, Cavus in Turkey for a week. Not as good as usual, as the hotel was full of Turkish families with hoards of children. Don't get me wrong - the Turkish families are probably more entitled to be there than the British visitors, but we are all regulars who go for the peace and quiet. It's a very small hotel, with a small but beautiful pool, right on the beach. The other problem this time was the fact that the temperature stayed between 40 C and 50C for the whole week - and the air conditioning in my room broke down. We spent every other day out on boat trips with our friends Hassan and Kerim, and even then, the wind blew hot. Looking forward to going back in September when the children will have gone back to school and the temperature is lower.

Came back from that, into the chaos that was Gatwick airport after the Glasgow fire-bomb, and the following Friday attended the Romantic Novelists' Association conference at Leicester University. A great time was had by all, and I met up with many friends whom I see only too infrequently, including Kate Walker, Mills and Boon novelist celebrating her 50th book. I have contributed to her blog party today, offering a copy of one of my books as a prize in a competition.

Anybody reading this who doesn't know about the Romantic Novelists' Association and is a writer of contemporary women's fiction, published or unpublished, should check them out. They are the friendliest and most supportive group of writers I have evr met, and I count some of my best friends among the members. And in case anyone has the idea that this is a bunch of little old ladies in pink who have a sweet sherry before dinner, as one friend put it, the bar staff were gobsmacked by the ravening hoard of women queuing - not for wine by the glass - but by the bottle!

Amanda Grange, to whose website there is a link on this page, gave an impromptu talk on the web, sites and blogs that stole the show and Liz Fenwick took some wonderful photographs including Bernardine Kennedy and me in the bar!

Books

2007-06-19T09:37:00.000Z

Strobe warning!

Slide show made for me by Amada Grange

Murder at The Laurels...

2007-05-25T08:30:00.000Z

...is finally out! It's been a big week, really, starting with Jane Wenham-Jones' launch of Wannabe a Writer at Borders in Charing Cross Road on Saturday. Thoroughly enjoyable, much wine was consumed and there were many mates to talk to. I also vaguely remember being asked to write a column about sex for the over fifties. I think I said yes, despite knowing nothing about it - from experience, that is, not age - but as I can't remember what it was for (magazine? Website?) I don't suppose it matters. Had even more drinks with Jane, Lynne Barrett-Lee and our publisher afterwards, a rather nice pub meal and a long taxi journey to Victoria via Euston. Don't ask.

Sunday my arthritis objected to too much wine and five hours of standing. My knees were so painful I could barely walk. I went to bed early on account of having to pick Travelling Daughter up at Heathrow at stupid o'clock and naturally didn't sleep. Duly picked her up, she having had only two hours sleep in 24, whereupon she phoned everyone in her phone book, had her hair done, downloaded all her photographs onto the computer, got them printed and insisted on the fizzy being opened the minute her big sister and nephew arrived at 5pm. By this time I was a wreck, having had roughly the same amount of sleep and cooked a four dish curry (her request) for 6 of us.

Tuesday I went to sign copies of Murder at The Laurels, which had officially come out on Monday, at our local indie bookshop, Pirie and Cavender. No public signing this time, as I want to do one for the next book in November, asnd I don't want the inhabitants of Whitstable to get fed up with me. Leo and I had a rehearsal for Murder Music and Mayhem and Wednesday both of them (Philly and Leo) left. Philly has gone up to spend the last two weeks of her tenancy at her London flat and Leo can't bear to stay in the house with his sister. (I did say she wouldn't be here for the next two weeks, but he'd been offered a room and it seemed churlish to refuse, especially as the offeree has also offered him a job.)

Yesterday, feeling bereft -empty nest syndrome - I went to pick up books (Jane's and Lynne's) I had ordered from afore-mentioned bookshop and the owner showed me our local paper, in which I appear larger than life with a whole page to myself. I am a "Whitstable Pearl" and the (extremely good looking) young reporter has been exceptionally kind and actually got things right. He's left out all the things I would have wanted in there, like mention of all my children and how talented they are, but otherwise it's fine. However, there will be a touch of the schadenfreudes among those who know me, I'm sure. Wait for her to trip up, they'll be saying.

Today I will work. Publisher telephoned on Monday to ask if I had the revisions ready for new edition of panto book which comes out in December and had I got a title for book 4 in the Libby Sarjeant series scheduled for next June. ?????? This, of course, all sounds wonderful to anyone not in the writing game. The reality is explained beautifully, and comically, in Jane's book. Read it, and you will realise why we're all still broke - and still doing it. Oh - and read mine, too.

Wannabe a Writer

2007-05-15T10:54:00.000Z

On Saturday 19th May at Borders, Charing Cross Road, I shall be among the "Assorted Other Writers" at the launch event of Jane Wenham-Jones' book "Wannabe a Writer". I'm hoping our mutual publishers will send along copies of Murder at The Laurels, even though its official escape day is Monday. It promises to be a meeting of old mates, as the writers in the photograph below will be there, along with many others, most of whom belong to the RNA. If you're in the area, come along and say hello.

Meanwhile, I have developed ANOTHER cold and have the works to go with it. Wobbly legs, temperature, sore throat and a complete inability to breathe through my nose. No sleep last night, then. Naturally, I have the first rehearsal of Music, Murder and Mayhem tonight, the cod radio play in which I shall be portraying Lady Evadne Thrusting, and tomorrow I'm being interviewed and photographed for a feature in the local paper. I shall no doubt sound like someone drowning and be photographed in a hooded cloak with impressive atmospheric shadows. All I really want to do is go to bed and put my head under the covers. How did I cope when I had four children running round? Did I cope? Comments from children no doubt coming up!

In the Coal Hole

2007-05-08T12:58:00.000Z

As promised, a photograph taken in the Coal Hole after the Savoy lunch. L to r: Judy Astley, Katie Fforde, Gilli Allen, Bernardine Kennedy, me and slightly behind, Jenny Harper. Photograph taken by Jan Jones.

Conferences and lunch

2007-05-06T10:33:00.000Z

Thanks to the wonderful Amanda Grange, there will soon be a slideshow of my titles. The woman should get a medal.

A month since I last posted, during which I've sent more money to Phillipa in New Zealand and Thailand, worked a bit more on the novel (62000 now, and should be a LOT more) and been to the Crime Writers' Association Conference in Ilkley and the Romantic Novel of the Year Award lunch at The Savoy.

The Crime Writers' conference was interesting and enjoyable. Much more relaxed than the RNA conference, but that's probably because it's only published writers, so they don't bother to have writers talking about their work or giving workshops. Some useful speakers, particularly Ian and Helen Pepper, a husband and wife team who lecture on the crime scene and aspects of forensic science. Very entertaining and informative. However, the most notable feature of the weekend, my first, was that somehow or other, I was talked into organising next year's conference. Certainly made me a lot of friends! Luckily, the estimable Tim Bates of Pollingers offered to help, so we have formed a committee of two, and already sorted out the venue.

The problem has been cost. Two nights and conference facilities in Yorkshire, booked over a year ago with prices held, is vastly different to the South East. However, we have received and ALMOST accepted a very competitive quote from the hotel both Tim and I favoured, The Hythe Imperial. I went to visit on Friday, and it's terrific.

The Savoy lunch was as mad as ever. You never get to speak to everyone you want to and the best bit is in The Coal Hole next door afterwards. When I find it, I'll post a picture. Rosie Thomas won the main award with Iris and Ruby, which is now on my TBR pile, and Nell Dixon won the Romance Prize with Marrying Max, ditto.

Daughter-in-law-elect Clare took me out to dinner on Friday night at the Morroccan Restaurant in Canterbury, very posh, and the Champagne Bar, newly opened in what was the County Hotel. Even posher and London prices. Shan't go again.

My ankles have gone into summer mode and swell almost as soon as I get up in the morning, so I'm off to the sofa with the laptop to work for the rest of this bank holiday Sunday. Well, what else would I do?

Catching up after Easter

2007-04-12T12:03:00.000Z

Having been prompted into action by a phone call from a friend wondering if I was all right, "or had I fallen off the planet?" I thought I'd better put in a quick update. Not that much has changed.

Family to lunch on Easter Sunday, and we spent most of the afternoon in the garden, which I have tried to do every day since! Glorious weather, and since my friend Chris redesigned my garden, and he and my son Miles created it, I just love being out there. It even promotes comments from young people passing through. Young chap visiting our "lodger" (son Leo's homeless friend) popped his head round the sitting room door to say goodbye and how much he admired my garden. Golly.

Deadline for current mss extended - not by me - so delighted. Going to try and break back into the short story market, so I've been buying the main contenders for a few weeks and reading stories by friends, including a serial called White Oaks by Lyn McCulloch. Do hope it appears in book form.

Big daughter Lou and her partner Jarrod have finally completed on their first house together. Owned house, that is, obviously they've been living in a house together for some time! Very excited and full of plans, but there's quite a lot of work to do, and the builders start next week. Spookily, when a friend called round to help me drink my whiskey last night, we discovered that the previous owners had been friends of his. Now, this isn't even in the same town, so even spookier. Mind you, it has happened before. A friend, Di, was moving to Bristol and telling me all about her cute new house. "Is it in a little courtyard?" I asked. "Yes." "Is it No. 3?" Mouth open:"Yes". "Is it King Dick's Lane?" Squeals of disbelief. I had actually stayed in that house, which belonged to the youngest sister of one of my best friends. Di and I lived in Whitstable, house was in Bristol, my old friend lives in Suffolk. So how much of a coincidence was that?

Must do some work, do some shopping and check up on the garden. Oh, and if anyone's interested my Philly (http://phillyontour.blogspot.com/) is having a whale of a time. The last pictures she sent were of her jumping out of an aeroplane. Oh, good.

Marketing Day

2007-03-11T09:41:00.000Z

Yesterday the Romantic Novelists' Association held a Marketing Day at the New Cavendish Club in London. Marketing guru and lecturer Alison Baverstock, www.alisonbaverstock.com, took us through the basics of marketing and gave us an outline marketing plan for authors, which I intend putting into practice immediately for Murder at The Laurels, which comes out in May. Then, our own Kate Allan, www.kateallan.com, took us through an efficient powerpoint presentation on modern marketing through the internet. Hence this blog. I've been seduced into using it as a diary when I should be using it as a promotional tool - and not letting out all this information about my family...and my birthday...oh, dear!

Anyway, it was an excellent and worthwhile day, and lovely to see so many friends, including Bernardine Kennedy, who, as usual, was my roomie, the indefatigable Jenny Haddon, current chair of the RNA, Jan Jones, Giselle Green, Roger Sanderson...too many to mention, and sorry to those I left out.

So now, I must start promoting Murder at The Laurels, which is difficult when my head is inside Murder in Midwinter (due out in November). Meanwhile, I shall pop in and see my daughter and grandson later, on this beautiful Sunday morning in Kent. (Whoops - too much information!!!)

Oh, and for the Novel Racers, I'm up to 40,000. Only another 45000 to go before the end of April. Help.

Best birthday in the world ever

2007-03-04T18:15:00.000Z

A man knocked me up yesterday morning - with a large M&S box containing flowers from my oldest friend who couldn't be with me in the evening. Then eldest daughter Louise phoned and sang at me, while baby Gus shouted in harmony. This was interrupted by Miles and partner Clare knocking on the door, with arms full (how did they manage that?) of flowers, balloons, POURED bucks fizz, pains au chocolat and croissants. After a lovely breakfast, I checked the emails to find loads of good wishes from my writing mates, and a great e-card from Philly, sent just before she embarked on her trip round the Whitsundays. She then managed to phone from her mobile, at ENORMOUS expense from mid-ocean.

Hairdresser at 12, and there aren't many of us who receive a bouquet from the hairdressers! Off home to try and find more vases, then Miles, Clare, Louise, Jarrod and Gus came to join Leo and me for lunchtime fizz, presents, cards and olives. I was touched beyond belief that the children had picked up a passing reference of mine to a limited edition facsimile of John Betjeman's Archie and the Strict Baptists, a story he wrote and illustrated for his children in a Windsor and Newton sketch book. It had been gift wrapped - beautifully, in recycled wrapping paper and rosette - by Long Barn books and included a postcard reproduction of the book with a suitable message. They all contributed, but Louise's was the guiding hand. Baby Gus bought me a new hat box (for old costume jewellery, not hats) and Miles and Clare bought me another terrific book, about Alfred Bestall (he of Rupert fame) by his god-daughter, and a beautiful Aveda Candle. Leo bought me Glenfiddich.

Leo's best friend Alex moved in during the afternoon, following a split with his girlfriend. As the poor lad's parents have gone back to New Zealand, I'm substitute Mum. Philly's bedroom now has all the stuff pushed to the walls and all Alex's stuff on top of it! Trust he and Leo will have found a flat together before Philly comes home to reclaim her space. So much for me saying no-one could stay...

Philly's ex arrived on his motorbike at 6, had a cup of tea and went off to Miles's house, then I went to change and get ready to celebrate.

Despite my saying many, many times I didn't want presents, no-one had taken any notice. Bling and booze was the recurring theme. Miles and his duo partner Martin, known as Bona Tunes, provided musical entertainment, augmented occasionally by Leo on keyboard and one song from Lou. Another friend sang, too, and what with the food, the music and the added bonus of the lunar eclipse, the joint was jumping. It was my best birthday ever, especially as a friend who had a stroke and is only recently out of hospital made it, thanks to his indefatigable wife, who, due to a selfish streak, she says(!) is not about to let him sit about and degenerate. He's going to be talking, walking properly and back playing the guitar if she has anything to do with it.

Managed to keep the spectre of Brian at bay most of the time, although it is difficult, what with everybody saying how like him both sons are, and especially when Miles is performing. And of course, Miles does some of his songs. Also, inevitably, one group of friends who were intially Brian's. Over the years, obviously, they became my closest friends, but since Brian's death we have drifted apart. But, bless them, they all came (including aforesaid friend with indefatigable wife) and stayed overnight. Hope to see them briefly this morning before lunching with cousins and children - thirteen of us, or fourteen with Gus.

I had the best time. Nearly 70 (apparently) people all having a good time, not necessarily with me, but with each other, my family and music. And I was so pleased with my outfit for the occasion I didn't want to take it off.

No hangover this morning as I was sensible last night. My first drink lasted an hour and three quarters! Finished up watching recorded episode of Primeval with a Glenfiddich and went happy to bed.

And thanks to my friend Mary, I have changed the time of this post to BST!

Tuesday

2007-02-27T10:13:00.000Z

I have recovered from the doom-laden previous post, although I still have a slight attack of the blue meanies. Partly because I am getting very fed up with living in what almost amounts to a police state - except the poor so-and-sos are also hide-bound by rules and regulations. Can't smoke, can't drink, can't park, hospitals closing (for good of patients, we are told??!!??) schools closing (see above), can't cuddle a child if it's hurt...oh, I could go on and on and on...

Over the last couple of weeks I had a return of the loo-leak that happened at Christmas, which has necessitated a new ceiling in the hall. I won't fill in all the details, but it has been stressful! Also have a man coming in to help me with my new wardrobe (cheap, Argos), so have contents of bedroom piled into spare room (or Phillipa's room when she's home). This means that I couldn't have anyone to stay over big party weekend even if I wanted to. (Heh, heh, heh.)

On final day of page proofing, and very glad I concentrated on them properly, as Editor Bob and I have both missed several anomalies. When I think how many times I have told students to check everything thoroughly - "Now, don't forget, don't change the colour of their eyes or hair" etc etc. I managed to change the name of a house and the name of a victim! Clever, eh?

Off I go, then. And congratulations to my friend Giselle Greene, who has just got a three book deal with HC. Way to go, Giselle.

18th February, and word count

2007-02-18T14:22:00.000Z

Today is the second anniversary of my husband's death, and the family and I were invited to the dedication of a bench in his memory on Whitstable beach. On Friday, my two sons did a gig in his memory at the club which he helped found, Brooke's Blues Bar in London, to raise money for the Macmillan nurses.

I have had a week of headaches, teeth-grinding at night and other obvious stress related symptoms. I can't talk to the children (32, 30, 24 and 22) about this, as he has become nigh on deified. I have gone along with the "we are a close family" for the last two years, including paying for everything he would have paid for, helping out with the sale of his house, paying for the storage of his furniture (which includes several items belonging to me, so I shouldn't complain!) and generally ignoring the absolutely awful circumstances surrounding his death. I'm not going to go into them now, but they'd make a terrific novel. Which I will never write.

But oh, God, how I want to move on. I adore my children, and I'm very grateful for their love and support, but I'm being tethered like a bloody goat. (Come to think of it, I am now a Nanny...)

I am in a foul mood today, as my youngest keeps telling me, and all I want to do is howl, because I still hurt and it's always in front of me. And I can't.

Ah well, on to more normal things. Shouldn't moan about personal things on here, should I? Oh - hang on, it's a diary. Well due to a good deal of research, other things on my mind and having to go to work at the Court on Friday, I'm only up to 25,190 words, a grand total of 5000ish this week. Next week will try and do better. And I've been forced to sign up to new blogger, so I probably need more help from jolly good friends less technologically challenged than I. (Hello, Mandy and Kate?)

Happy days are here again...

See you next week.

Novel Race and party.

2007-02-11T13:10:00.000Z

Despite editor and I having a tough old tussle over timing and alibis etc, Murder at The Laurels is finally on its way to the printers - at least, I think so. Or just line edits. Whatever, I'm now able to concentrate on Murder in Midwinter, for which I have now signed the contract, so no pressure. Word count now 20,637, with which I'm quite pleased, as I lost a whole week with the rewrites.

Enjoyable talk at Rochester Library, where they had very kindly asked the local bookshop to provide copies for sale. To my astonishment, we sold seven!

Also discovered a museum this week, where they may well have some archive material useful in research for Murder in Midwinter. It was a feature in BBC's Inside Out, the local interest programme which alerted me, in itself a useful research tool.

My non-special birthday, to be celebrated just because it falls on a Saturday, is now 3 weeks away, and the guest list is now over 60. I don't mind, because I'm having it in a local function room, inculding buffet, which means none of that rushing backwards and forwards with plates of food all day before, and clearing up afterwards. Just turn up, drink, chat and listen to favurite duo, which just happens to be son Miles and friend Martin, performing as Bona Tunes. And yes, I've offered to pay them... Lou will be singing, I hope, at least one ot two numbers, and Leo will join in on the keyboard at some point. Pity Philly won't be there, but it's a long way from Aus...

This week I have been marooned on an island surround by broken concrete and mud while the local council replace the footpaths. I have my very own orange barriers round my car, which is having to be parked on double yellows rather than its concrete base outside my house, but it's a little like escaping from Colditz to get out of the house. Happy days.

Word count, pantomimes and rewrites

2007-01-30T10:48:00.000Z

As a novel racer, I'm a complete failure, 12361 as a matter of fact, but my excuse is rewrites on Murder at The Laurels. Editor and I in tussle over a question of timing and alibis. So, having thought I'd finished, I now have to have another go at it this morning. Sorry, fellow racers, but I have a valid excuse, don't I?

Since my last post, we had a Drama Committee meeting at the theatre (Whitstable Playhouse) and next season's pantomime is to be my Sleeping Beauty (published by Jasper Publishing) directed by me. Two years ago, I swore I wouldn't do another one, but that was when my husband died, a traumatic time, to say the least. Now, I'm panicking. Next winter, no sitting down every evening in front of the fire to go mindless in front of the television. The good thing, though, publicity-wise, is that book 3, Murder in Midwinter, is scheduled to come out on November 19th and has a background of - you've guessed it - pantomime! The title, by the way, was thought up by eldest daughter Louise. Yes, I know it looks easy and obvious, but publisher and I had been agonising for days.

Going to see this year's panto at The Playhouse tonight. Will no doubt make me feel inadequate, despite my years of experience. Oh, and next Wednesday I'm giving a talk at Rochester Library. Must find out what they want me to talk about...

Back to rewrites.

New word count and guilt

2007-01-20T00:29:00.000Z

Sad to say I'm still only 9408 words into the race, partly due to ongoing t'internet problems, which affect the research I'm still doing, and family related things. However, it seems to have got itself rolling, and I have more of an idea of where I'm going with it.

The guilt is to do with my much beloved eldest daughter Louise, my first born, mother of my first and only grandson, who is now six and a half months old. For most of their lives, certainly from as soon as they were able to understand, my four children knew a) I didn't want to be a grandmother and b) I wasn't going to be on tap to babysit. My parents lived too far away and Brian's parents were in Australia, and by the time we actually had my mother to live with us, briefly, the two older children were almost out of the babysitting years.

My daughter is a professional singer (and she'll read this, so sorry, Lou), her partner, the also much beloved Jarrod, is a professional musician. Lou's gigs usually start with her leaving home between mid-day and 4 in the afternoon, getting back between 2 and 3 the next morning. A lot of them are abroad, which necessitates at least one overnight stay, and certainly means leaving home around 6am. I have expressed concern for years, even before she was with Jarrod, having formerly been married to another musician (what a perishing family) about how she would cope with a child if she decided to go back to her profession. This is now what she wants to do. Co-grandma doesn't go out a lot and is therefore happy to babysit, but not for that length of time, I do go out a fair bit, and definitely don't want to babysit for that length of time. Herein lies the guilt.

I have berated friends of mine for giving up their lives for their grandchildren, one in particular has done so, and many friends have told me I would feel different once I had my own. Sadly, I don't. My friend Beryl Kingston has written a book, Neptune's Daughter, with this subject as one of the themes, giving me to realise it isn't only me who has a problem in this area. I know I will have to babysit sometimes, but how galling to think that if I get an invitation to dinner, or to a party, I can't go because I'm babysitting. I did that for a very long time with my own four.

Oh, dear. Comments welcome, especially if they tell me how to resolve the issue without losing a daughter.

Happy New year and Novel Race

2007-01-18T11:16:00.000Z

Happy New Year to everybody, and apologies for not keeping up with the ethos of blogging!

Family situations, deadlines and health have all played their part in my silence, but I have joined the great Novel Race, and if my dodgy broadband connection lasts (I've tried to do this more than once) I'll try and get the links up. I have an April deadline and I'm only 8000 in, so I've got my work cut out. Mind you, if I was Penny Jordan it would be a piece of cake. She, who can confidently expect to write 26000 between now and Tuesday, taking today and tomorrow off. Gosh.

Also, I'm in My Weekly this week. And I didn't say a lot of it, before you ask.

See you soon.

Breezeblock Park, Five Things and books

2006-11-19T13:02:00.000Z

Well, that's Breezeblock Park over. A little known Willy Russell play first performed, as they all were, at The Everyman in Liverpool in 1975, starring Julie Walters, Sheila Hancock (my character) and Norman Rossington. Three couples within a family live on the same council estate, and the action takes place on Christmas Eve and Christmas Day. An extremely funny play, it also has Willy Russell's trademark bittersweet edge, culminating in my character's breakdown. It is also the play that gave Caroline Ahern the idea for the Royle Family, and we were given permission to reprint her letter to Russell in the programme. It went very well, full houses almost every night, and all the women in the cast were given a vibrator as a memento. Don't ask.

I've been tagged by my friend Bernardine Kennedy to reveal Five Little Known Facts about myself. I can't think of any! However, I'll try. I was a stewardess on the last commercial flight out of Israel as the six day war began. (That dates me.) I did hand modelling for Freeman's catalogue. I was asked to be a Playboy Bunny. (And said no.) I was married for a year to a photographer. I can't eat cheese.

Most of those came from my children, because I couldn't remember anything most people didn't already know about me. Well, I say most people - I mean most people I know. And I expect they all know the above facts, too. I'm not proud.

I was delighted with the response to my previous blog about children's books. I've been given lots more to look out for, and reminded of some I'd forgotten. Jenny Haddon mentioned Susan Cooper's Dark Is Rising series, and of course, Diana Wynne-Jones' Chrestomancy series, all of which I've bought for myself during the last few years. My eldest daughter, she of the recent motherhood, who posted first, has, of course, exactly the same taste as I have, except that she also loved Mallory Towers.

Now looking forward to staying in every night and concentrating on finishing and delivering manuscript to publishers by the end of the week. (Oh, yeah?) Bye for now.

Happiness is a book discovery

2006-11-07T11:38:00.000Z

I have many favourite books - naturally, I'm a writer. But there are a few I re-read every year, and some of them I've even shoe-horned into my current book. These are: The Little White Horse, I Capture the Castle, The Swish of the Curtain, Golden Pavements and Three Men in a Boat. Notice anything? Four of them are loosely defined as children's books. I also re-read Monica Edwards, Malcolm Saville, Ngaio Marsh and Georgette Heyer every year - not their entire oeuvre, but the odd few books.

Thanks to t'internet, I've also begun to collect and replace gaps in my collection, something I would have thought impossible a few years ago. I even found a book which used to make my mother and father - and me - laugh out loud when I was a teenager, of which I only remembered the title. I found it - exorbitantly priced, and two other books by the same author. Unfortunately, they didn't stand up to my memories.

This is not the case with the children's books. I've obtained Monica Edwards books I hadn't read since I was about 14, and they are as brilliant as ever. Malcolm Saville, too, although they seem to me now to be slightly condescending. Edwards isn't. Neither is my other favourite, Pamela Brown. Perhaps that's because she started her first book, the above mentioned "Swish" when she was only 14 herself.

To my delight, I have found an internet retailer who not only shares my anorakey love of old pony books - she has a whole section of her site devoted to them - but has a copy of a Pamela Brown book I lost years ago. She is at http://www.janebadgerbooks.co.uk Between us, we've come up with an idea that might appear here on this blog one day - when I've got the current mss - now late - to the publisher. Watch this space. Or not. Up to you. But would love to hear about people's favourite children's books. And whether there are many out there who still buy and read children's books.

Dating, drinking and women's magazines

2006-10-30T11:03:00.000Z

No, there isn't a connection between any of the above, just three separate topics I want to sound off about. First - geriatric dating.

I'm a widow. I have been on my own for some years now, during which time I have joined and rejoined every internet dating site there is. Always saying - I shan't bother again - then reading somewhere about someone's success (this time it was novelist Lesley Pearce, with whom I share not only a first name, but a taste for white wine in wine bars in Bath) and giving it a go once more.

Originally, I thought anyone who used this sort of service was bound to be a saddo. Hang on a minute - I'm using it. Oh, yes. There must be people like me out there, then. Well, I can safely say now - no, there aren't. I have seen photographs (won't even consider anyone without) of pleasant looking gents of around my age and written them jokey little notes. Most haven't replied, those that have, in the main, have fobbed me off. Oh, I've met a few, obeying all the rules - public places, not giving out my address, all that sort of thing - but without exception they have all been disasters. Nice men in their way, I'm sure, but not for me.

The only people who have written to me first have been, well, let's just say not suitable. Or the right age. Or anything. So why am I still registered on these sites? Not as a paying customer any more, admittedly, but my details are still there. Well, firstly because I have this sneaky feeling that if I remove my details, the very person I've been looking for will register and I'll miss him. Secondly, I still want to meet a nice bloke with whom to share some aspects of my life. Thirdly, how else does a female rapidly hurtling towards decrepitude meet someone? When you've lived in the same area for a long time and socialised a fair bit, you tend to know most people, and single men of my age don't tend to move about.

One of the problems, of course, is the unrealistic expectations of subscribers to these sites, and, I've heard, gents in general. A 60 year old, boasting that he looks years younger, mixes with younger people, windsurfs, snowboards and likes Flaming Lips, asks to be contacted by slim women under 40. Oh, yeah?

Standard advice from agony aunts and uncles is to join something. OK, I already belong to the supposed hot bed of sex and lies, the world of amateur theatre. And no, mostly, it isn't like that. There have been the occasional affairs and marriage breakups, but not regularly. One permanent relationship has been formed in my twenty-odd years with the same company, and what does that tell you?

Before anyone else says it, I shall admit to a certain amount of unrealistic expectations myself and I shall also admit to being not everybody's cup of tea. Fat, mad old bat are descriptions that come to mind. And no, I'm not saying that in the expectation (that word again) of being contradicted. Of course, I could go to a proper dating agency, but have you seen how much they cost? And I just know it would be wasted, even if I could afford it in the first place.

I once tried to start a fairly local group to meet socially. Fashionably Late, it was called. I had very little money, but managed to pay for a few ads in the paper and got a little bit of editorial in a couple of suitable magazines. The only responses I had were from women in my own position. Had I been able to afford advertising in more magazines, maybe it would have worked, but having recently joined a dining club locally, also mainly women, have to admit it probably wouldn't.

Drinking - they, the ubiquitous "they", have stopped us smoking in pubs, now they're going to stop us drinking, too. I will end up making bath-tub gin and drinking it alone in the garage soon. Or perhaps with my children and a few selected friends. Except that then I'd be prosecuted for running an illegal drinking den. I am sick, sick, sick of the nanny state. I do not want to be told what to do, think, eat or drink. I buy and eat responsibly and ethically as far as I can without breaking the bank. I don't frighten the horses. Let me be!

Women's magazines - very nice people. Two of them have interviewed me because of my connection with amateur theatre on which they are doing features. This comes from my recent book having an amateur theatrical background, and is terrific publicity. When the features come out, I'll post details.

Oh, and thank you to my three readers!

Phalanx of Family

2006-10-15T09:18:00.000Z

Well, it sounded like a good title...

Spent the week trying to catch up on book 2, although it kept taking me to places where I needed even more research. Bit of a nuisance, sometimes, this writing lark. Monday night had a very long red wine session with a friend who's recently been freed from a long sentence as a carer. Tuesday, felt extremely - er - tired.

Have also been trying to learn words, which isn't working very well, either. Must make an effort today, while son Leo is out making a short film for entry into the Canterbury Festival.

On Friday, eldest daughter Louise, mother of infant grandson Gus, returned to work as a singer by doing a half hour warm up set at our local theatre for the main event, her partner Jarrod's band, Hullabaloo. As this was something of an event, Louise's normal appearances with the Pasadena Roof Orchestra being all over the country and Europe, several members of my family decided to come to Whitstable to watch. Also best man Roger, currently living in South Africa, happened to be in the country, so arrived to stay as well. Very good concert at The Playhouse, and yesterday everybody met up at our local for lunch. Noise level was incredible. By the time they'd all gone and I returned to the pub for the regular fortnightly quiz, I was completely kn-----ed. I'm too old for all this.

However, it was a great couple of days, and I loved seeing the family. My cousins are very special to me, as I am an only child, but we have all always kept in touch and are the best of friends.

Must now go and catch up with some of the things I haven't done over the last few days. Feels very silly writing all this knowing that nobody will read it.

Love Potions

2006-10-09T10:42:00.000Z

Delighted to say I have now received my copy of "Love Potions" by my friend Christina Jones (http://www.christinajones.co.uk), and naturally started reading straight away - standing up with my early morning cup of tea. Christina's most recent books are what she calls bucolic frolics with a somewhat magical theme: Hubble Bubble, Seeing Stars and now, Love Potions.

Ever since her first mainstream novel, Going The Distance, I have loved Christina's books, as have both my daughters, Louise and Phillipa. In fact, Going The Distance was the book that started Phillipa reading fiction, since when she has become Christina's most devoted fan. For years she wouldn't read anything else but kept re-reading Christina, but eventually I persuaded her to try Jill Mansell, to whom she became almost as devoted. She wants to live in one of the villages created by these writers and measures everybody else by their standards. What you've got to live up to, girls!

Managed to get to my drama committee meeting and contributed very little, other than hearing myself, as from very, very far away volunteering to direct next season's pantomime. 2008, you understand, not January 2007. That really would be foolish...

Now, all I have to do this week is get at least 20,000 words of book written, learn words, find an electrician and someone who can dig the garden. Any suggestions?

Groping for Words

2006-10-08T16:36:00.001Z

Not me, although I frequently grope for words, but the title of the play my son Leo was appearing in last week. By Sue Townsend and set in the 1970s, it is about a literacy teacher, her two pupils and the young caretaker of the school in which she holds her classes. There are some funny moments, but concentrates mainly on the hidden sadnesses in all their lives. Very moving in places. Son Leo, playing Kevin the caretaker, was excellent (naturally!) and provided most of the humour. V. proud Mum.

Had two rather nice experiences yesterday, too. One was an email from the man who sold me my dishwasher, who had woken me up at silly o'clock to check something, causing me to appear at the door in my (luckily opaque) nightdress, after which I dashed upstairs to put on a dressing gown. Email told me later in the day that I was still gorgeous. Wasn't that nice? Then received a kiss from someone I've known for a long time. Shocked me into the middle of next week, but hugely bolstering to my middle aged ego.

Today, however, suffering from a migraine and have a drama committee meeting this evening at the theatre. Is a migraine a good enough excuse...? While lying on the sofa recovering, I had an idea for the current book, so every cloud etc etc. Will report later in the week whether it worked.

Hurrah! and links

2006-10-06T10:12:00.000Z

Two posts in one day!!! Have just got the excellent news that I am STILL in The Bookseller's Small Publishers' Top Ten - holding at number 7. That's four weeks running. Isn't that fabulous? OK, it's not The Times, or even mass market fiction Top Tens, but I'm in there with The Life of Pi and We Need to Talk About Kevin.

Until I get slightly more proficient and add the links to my side bar, some of the blogs and/or websites I would like to be associated with are as follows: Bernardine Kennedy, www.bernardinekennedy.com Jenny Haddon, www.jennyhaddon.com The Romantic Novelists Association, www.rna-uk.org, Accent Press, of course (see previous post) and the Maniacmum blog.

Blogging, working and Cavus Bay

2006-10-06T09:48:00.000Z

I've now discovered how time wasting this is! Been posting on other people's blogs and fiddling with my own instead of working.

However, I'm over half way on the new book, and trying to prevent characters from running off in all directions. Forwards would be good, and fairly fast, if I'm do the other half in the next four weeks. Publishers Accent Press (www.accentpress.co.uk) are currently in Frankfurt, so I'm hoping they'll be too busy to chase me up when they get back...

I have been asked about Cavus Bay, see previous post, so here are two shots of it. As you can see, it is very beautiful and extremely quiet. Us regulars are torn between sharing it and losing the essential feel of the place, and losing it altogether because there are so few visitors now that no tour operators go there.

Dolphins and libraries

2006-10-04T12:44:00.000Z

Day two - a quick report on a talk yesterday evening at Lyminge Library, where, apart from the librarians, I was easily the youngest - and I'm not young! The ten ladies and one gentleman were part of a reading group, and had held their meeting in the morning in order to save my blushes while they pulled my book to pieces. They were very sweet and quite complimentary, and very impressed when I reported my three weeks in the Small Publishers' Top Ten. They were also thrilled to learn how many of their favourite authors I knew - particularly Katie Fforde, Jill Mansell, Anna Jacobs and Benita Brown.

Courtesy of my friend, Jonathan Goss, here is a photograph of the dolphins that came to play on one of our boat trips in Turkey last week, along with a picture of me on the boat. Don't think anyone's reading this, yet - except Jules, of course. And Mandy.

Welcome to my blog

2006-10-03T12:08:00.000Z

Well, this is it. Thanks to Mandy, blogger-guru extraordinaire, I now have a blog. I have a sneaking feeling it will be just another excuse to procrastinate and not get on with work, which is Not A Good Thing. Having just returned from a fortnight in my favourite place in Turkey, Cavus, I now have four weeks (give or take a month!) to hand in my second novel to my publisher and learn the words for the play I'm in next month. This evening I'm going to Lyminge Library to give a talk to their reading group, the rest of the week I'm rehearsing and going to see my youngest son Leo as Kevin in Sue Townsend's 'Groping for Words'.

When I'm a bit more confident, I'll put up pictures of dolphins, kids and other distractions. Meanwhile, although I'm not the most natural grandparent, here's picture of my grandson, Gus.

Once again, thanks, Mandy. I'll do the links asap!